1. It is absolutely not too late, very slightly higher risk for autism and a higher risk for your wife, but very possible. 2. There is adoption and fostering,

1. It is absolutely not too late, very slightly higher risk for autism and a higher risk for your wife, but very possible. 2. There is adoption and fostering, it’s seriously important 3. I’d unpack this with your wife and a therapist and not HN. Kids don’t fix what is broken, they amplify it. Further, if things aren't right, you’re not only screwed up but you can screw them up. ‘Expectation’ is kind of a dirty word for marriages and families, if you’ve made choices and expected things to be different you have to be open to the idea that your expectations weren’t yours to have, there are other people involved and you love them and want them to be what they are and not your idea or fantasy of what they should be. If the idea of it having kids was to live a certain way (travel, have money, etc..) Understand that kids are a never ending life of service, but it feels good.