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This line hit me hard: > In a draft of his memoir, Ray modified his definition of depression: “This is not an illness, it is not a sickness – it is a state of

This line hit me hard: > In a draft of his memoir, Ray modified his definition of depression: “This is not an illness, it is not a sickness – it is a state of disconnection.” I've seen it in myself and in some of my closest friends, where we just start to disconnect more and more from others, more and more from ourselves. Especially from how we're feeling. Wanting to avoid emotions and thoughts, suppress them, repress them. I'm not too familiar with the vast theory in psychology and psychoanalysis, maybe what I'm proposing is quite aligned with Freudian or other thinking. Just seems to me that when we disconnect, especially from how we're feeling, we can slowly start to shrink into ourselves and if we don't stop it, we sometimes implode. Conversely, that by connecting more with how we're feeling, we can start to expand a bit, not just with ourselves but with other people. One of the challenges in that being as we expand, things happen that can make us want to contract (rejection, being ignored, idolized, etc) and then back on the shrinking path again.

philosopher1234 4y ago
The question is, what is it about these challenges that cause you personally to retreat into depression, because we know that there are people who can tolerate some amount of rejection. I think that’s a psychoanalytic question, to explore what it is about you personally that responds with depression.
chalst 4y ago
I like the insight that the the depressed don't suffer from the feeling of depression, they suffer from an ecology of mutually reinforcing emotions; cf. the picture on https://medium.com/@makinwellness/how-depression-actually-feels-409246c01b https://medium.com/@makinwellness/how-depression-actually-fe... 'Feeling nothing' I don't believe is a thing, rather the failure to know what you feel means you have isolated your consciousness from awareness of how you actually feel. That's a sign of the disconnection you are talking about. Connecting with others is hugely important, but also a hard step. Exercise can help, and can be seen as connecting with yourself. Don't attack yourself for failing to meet any particular exercise target, though.

philosopher1234 4y ago

The question is, what is it about these challenges that cause you personally to retreat into depression, because we know that there are people who can tolerate some amount of rejection. I think that’s a psychoanalytic question, to explore what it is about you personally that responds with depression.

chalst 4y ago

I like the insight that the the depressed don't suffer from the feeling of depression, they suffer from an ecology of mutually reinforcing emotions; cf. the picture on https://medium.com/@makinwellness/how-depression-actually-feels-409246c01b https://medium.com/@makinwellness/how-depression-actually-fe... 'Feeling nothing' I don't believe is a thing, rather the failure to know what you feel means you have isolated your consciousness from awareness of how you actually feel. That's a sign of the disconnection you are talking about. Connecting with others is hugely important, but also a hard step. Exercise can help, and can be seen as connecting with yourself. Don't attack yourself for failing to meet any particular exercise target, though.