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> I’m not commenting on over/under diagnosing of ADHD, I’m commenting on a condition that some individuals legitimately deal with. Some find themselves unable t

• voidwtf 4y ago
  One could say the same about many conditions or qualities one might be born with, in fact many deaf people don’t consider their inability to hear as an impairment. There is a rich deaf culture and entire schools dedicated to deaf students. However, that’s where you have to meet reality where it is, not where you want it to be. Mental illness typically begins not with the condition but when that condition impairs the individuals ability to operate within the parameters of the society they are a member of. When the condition impairs their ability to meet their own definition of success or happiness. My son was not happy with the way other kids treated him, it hurt me to see him hurt. My son was not happy in school, he thought the teacher was mean and didn’t like him because she wouldn’t give him enough time to finish his school work, and would force him to switch tasks with the rest of the class. My son was not happy that his older sister often didn’t want to play with him. Was my son doing something wrong? He just wanted to play, he wanted to run the fastest, bounce the ball the most, just go crazy. But sometimes the other kids wanted a break, sometimes they wanted rules to the game, sometimes they wanted him to stop. He could get so worked up he couldn’t just “stop”. In school he understood all the material, it was easy for him, he could read better than most of his peers, critical thinking tasks were easy for him. However, focus and time management were completely out of his grasp. The teacher wasn’t mean, she just had more material to teach him, they had to move in to the next topic. When he would get excited, that excitement would become intensity, that intensity would alienate him from his peers and sometimes from his older sister. His biggest advocate and ardent defender would want space away from him. Maybe the paradigm is flawed, but sometimes a train without brakes is just a train without brakes.
• voidwtf 4y ago
  Since you edited your comment while I was replying, I didn’t get to address your second paragraph. You’re right, normies don’t run the world. Be different, be you, don’t let others tell you what to like or what not to like. I have told my children this and they know they have my unconditional support and acceptance. But don’t expect acceptance from everyone, our society is not so enlightened. Especially not children. Kids want to be liked, they want to be loved, they want the acceptance of their peers and those that they admire or look up to. Children can also be cruel to one another, not intentionally, they often have a lack of matured empathy. You have to be able to choose your battles. It’s not about making him normal, it’s about giving him the tools to be who he wants to be. It’s about giving him the control he otherwise lacks.
• tpmoney 4y ago
  >I'm of the opinion that there's nothing wrong with that. I lean more towards the acceptance side of things. Humans are diverse in many ways. I don't believe we should be attempting to stifle that with drugs. For the first time in my life, with decades of experience dealing with and managing ADHD with soft skills and sheer stubbornness I started medications for ADHD last year. The significant changes and disruptions to society and daily life of the COVID 19 pandemic left me in a position where my skills were no longer adequate to deal with my condition. A loss of focus helpers (like a dedicated working environment, commute times, access to fellow co-workers etc), added stresses caused by dealing with other medical issues in the new paradigm, easy access to other distractions and more added up to a crippling depression and self loathing as I became less and less capable of performing to the standards that I knew I was capable of and had performed at even just a couple years before. I tried anti-depressants because I was depressed, so of course that seems the right way to go. But no amount of anti-depressant or counseling will fix self disappointment and frustration at being unable to bring yourself to perform to your known potential. There was no "value" in my inability to do my job, to do the things I'm good at and the things I enjoy. I wasn't doing something else that was more fulfilling. I wasn't learning something new about myself, or finding an alternative path to success. I was spinning in circles trying ot do what I wanted to do and failing at it over and over again for no other reason than decades of skills and practice were no longer effective in the world I found myself in. Maybe, on a long enough time scale, I could have learned new strategies. I could have spent large enough sums of money to build a new and different environment around me to support those new skills. And in the mean time I would have spent years spiraling further and further into depression for failing to be the person I wanted to be and was capable of being. Taking ADHD medications helped. The struggle to deal with the way life is no longer the same is still there, but I'm not having to fight my own head at the struggles at the same time. The week I started it, for the first time in my entire life I thought to myself "I need to do task A" and then just got up and did that thing to its completion, and then I did it again for task B, and again for task C. No minutes to hours prepping myself, working up the energy and mental gumption to do the thing. No mental dance to shift between tasks. No fight to stay on task A instead of jumping between A, B and C. I don't think it's possible for me to explain how incredible it felt to be able to just "decide" to do a task, or how it feels now to know I've never actually been able to do something that way before. Skills are useful, and knowing the ones I do make it easier to deal with the days where even with the medications I still struggle. But a key component to diagnosing a disorder is "does it negatively impact your ability to conduct your life". Diversity is one thing, but no one should have to fight their own head to live the life they want just for the sake of "diversity".
• autoexec 4y ago
  > I don't believe we should be attempting to stifle that with drugs. Even if society placed zero demands on me whatsoever and I never had to worry about being anywhere at a specific date/time, or never had to sit still for any length of time if I didn't feel like it, I still wouldn't be happy suffering from ADHD. ADHD is not some perfectly normal but uncommon personality quirk that our narrow minded society has cruelly chosen to punish, it's a neurodevelopmental disorder impacting executive function making it difficult for people to accomplish the things they want to even entirely on their own terms. Some people can find coping strategies that let them get by with only minor difficulty, but for others there is no amount of skill development or accommodation that is going to make up for their malfunctioning brains. Medication isn't for everyone. It's not effective for everyone, and isn't necessary for everyone, but it'd be wrong to think that without the expectations imposed on us by society medication would never be necessary or that ADHD isn't really a problem because it's just a different way of doing things or looking at the world. It's mental illness, and one way or another symptoms will typically need to be treated or it will cause the mentally ill person needless suffering.
• FooBarBizBazz 4y ago
  I was bored as fuck as a child in school, and very nearly ended up with an ADHD diagnosis. The eventual "cure" was honors classes.