Being at the same ability level matters way more than being at the same age. Speaking from personal experience, the whole "let's try to pretend that this kid is

Being at the same ability level matters way more than being at the same age. Speaking from personal experience, the whole "let's try to pretend that this kid is normal and that with enough time he will fit in" has had terrible consequences on my mental health, and even on my social ability with the rare people that I feel comfortable with. I think that in many case, trying to pretend that people are the same when they are not is causing a lot of pain for everyone involved. Holding a conversation with a normal person requires me to expand a lot of energy to not be myself, because if I am I will quickly be hurt and/or rejected. And just like I often hurt people by being myself, other people hurt me by being themselves. Trying to explain it to them has been pointless in all situation, and most of the time makes the situation worse. Why would any of us have to endure that, when we could instead be with groups of like-minded people and enjoy life more? I don't feel superior to those people, and spending more time with them leads me to develop more negative sentiments towards them. I think the sane option is to avoid them as much as possible, while making sure that I treat them with respect. I can't change fundamentally who I am, they can't change who they are. I can't understand why you advocate for a situation that creates so much suffering for everyone involved.