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To me it's optimism. Something really hard to teach kids who've been brought up in a pessimistic family. (probably the majority) That's one of the reasons I pus

To me it's optimism. Something really hard to teach kids who've been brought up in a pessimistic family. (probably the majority) That's one of the reasons I push to learn about people's childhoods. To contrast and compare the results of different upbringings and extract useful tactics. Funny thing about kids is they can go left or right, the worst conditions can produce a diamond, whilst his or her siblings end up with a life of misery. Glad you got some value from the interview. Paul.

brc 15y ago
Gordon Ramsay is the example that pops to mind, if you read his autobiography. He is the driven to succeed man who never sits still, while his brother is a helpless heroin addict. Both came from the same family. There's probably a yin/yang in there as well, as one brother tries harder to distance himself from the family, and the other sinks deeper because he has a statistical outlier for an immediate sibling to compare himself to. But what makes the rocker switch go one way or the other in childhood? It's funny, because I was thinking about this very topic not long before reading this interview and the comments here, but in relation to food attitudes. Does the way food is treated in a household determine whether we over or under eat as time goes by? Is it the same for pessimism and optimism in terms of motivation as well? I don't know the answers but it's good to think about.
- SubvertMagazine 15y ago
  There's a whole science to whether you were born first, second, third etc. And I think Malcolm Gladwell picked up on the time of year you are born, having a huge effect on your experience in school, at the top or bottom end of the class. I'm absolutely positive you're right about the food thing. As for the issue of how much can we change these things, well I agree with Seth's answer to that, I'm sure it's better to believe we can, than to believe we can't. People like Martin Seligman can help us break down what optimism is and make it into a habit with his books like "Learned Optimism". I think there are two important factors for changing these things. 1) Understand how deeply they are implanted in us from a young age. These attitudes have deep deep roots. To change them you have to dig deep. 2) That digging deep can actually happen quickly IF enough pressure is applied. The strength of the emotion you attach to the job makes a huge difference. I talk about anger in the interview because the negative emotions are as powerful, if not more for starting the process of change that the positive ones. People change in an instant when something happens that makes them highly emotional (child or adult). Whether its extreme humiliation, fear, loss. I think the so called "negative" emotions are more linked to immediate survival than everyday "positive" emotions. So when confronted with them they give us more power to make deeper decisions and change how we think and operate. On a practical level, if you're trying to change something, always make sure that you start that process clearly identifying WHY you want to change. From both the negative perspective and the positive perspective. What makes you so angry or embarrassed that you want to move away from it forever. And what would you be happy to move towards. PS. we've also done a lot of interviews (many not published yet) with some of the world's top personal trainers and fitness experts. I've also done a course on changing and sticking with healthy habits, due out in the new year. I don't want to turn this into a pitch, but if the food issue is of interest to you, there's lots of great stuff to come on that topic. All the best. Paul.

brc 15y ago

Gordon Ramsay is the example that pops to mind, if you read his autobiography. He is the driven to succeed man who never sits still, while his brother is a helpless heroin addict. Both came from the same family. There's probably a yin/yang in there as well, as one brother tries harder to distance himself from the family, and the other sinks deeper because he has a statistical outlier for an immediate sibling to compare himself to. But what makes the rocker switch go one way or the other in childhood? It's funny, because I was thinking about this very topic not long before reading this interview and the comments here, but in relation to food attitudes. Does the way food is treated in a household determine whether we over or under eat as time goes by? Is it the same for pessimism and optimism in terms of motivation as well? I don't know the answers but it's good to think about.

SubvertMagazine 15y ago
There's a whole science to whether you were born first, second, third etc. And I think Malcolm Gladwell picked up on the time of year you are born, having a huge effect on your experience in school, at the top or bottom end of the class. I'm absolutely positive you're right about the food thing. As for the issue of how much can we change these things, well I agree with Seth's answer to that, I'm sure it's better to believe we can, than to believe we can't. People like Martin Seligman can help us break down what optimism is and make it into a habit with his books like "Learned Optimism". I think there are two important factors for changing these things. 1) Understand how deeply they are implanted in us from a young age. These attitudes have deep deep roots. To change them you have to dig deep. 2) That digging deep can actually happen quickly IF enough pressure is applied. The strength of the emotion you attach to the job makes a huge difference. I talk about anger in the interview because the negative emotions are as powerful, if not more for starting the process of change that the positive ones. People change in an instant when something happens that makes them highly emotional (child or adult). Whether its extreme humiliation, fear, loss. I think the so called "negative" emotions are more linked to immediate survival than everyday "positive" emotions. So when confronted with them they give us more power to make deeper decisions and change how we think and operate. On a practical level, if you're trying to change something, always make sure that you start that process clearly identifying WHY you want to change. From both the negative perspective and the positive perspective. What makes you so angry or embarrassed that you want to move away from it forever. And what would you be happy to move towards. PS. we've also done a lot of interviews (many not published yet) with some of the world's top personal trainers and fitness experts. I've also done a course on changing and sticking with healthy habits, due out in the new year. I don't want to turn this into a pitch, but if the food issue is of interest to you, there's lots of great stuff to come on that topic. All the best. Paul.