This might sound facetious, but my biggest regret is spending time regretting things. I was socially awkward and tried to overcome it: had fun, had panic attac

This might sound facetious, but my biggest regret is spending time regretting things. I was socially awkward and tried to overcome it: had fun, had panic attacks, learned some tricks, but still just as socially awkward. Many other flaws of mine I’ve tried to overcome similarly and not really got anywhere. I just don’t care about them now and want to be unapologetically ME as I exist. This attitude has ended up paying dividends. No one cares if I’m awkward, or kinda mental or any of my other flaws. People actually seem to enjoy me… ? Now at 29 I can look back at my teens-20s and how things could have gone differently, but there’s no point. Me then could never have been like me now and I couldn’t have convinced myself to, even with a time machine. It’s like I’ve reached a point of “sour grapes” but without any cope. My life, successes, flaws and mistakes just… are… and I have to accept it. I’m done trying to go against my nature to transform to some state I’ll never reach, for god knows who. I’ll continue to learn from my missteps. I’ll continue to try new things and get into and out of trouble for the frisk. I’ll continue awkwardly trying to elevate the people around me and keep them in good spirits. But I’m done feeling inadequate for my flaws or wasting time trying to fight my nature. Oh, I wish I started endurance running earlier but again, there was a reason I didn’t and I do now, so fuck it.