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Whiner Jerkins All Hands Meeting Powerpoint Revealed
- emmett 18y ago"Preview mode disabled" - that is pretty horrible.
- mattmaroon 18y agoAccident. Fixed.
- abstractbill 18y agoThis is what it looks like to me: http://abstractnonsense.com/mm-slides.png http://abstractnonsense.com/mm-slides.png I can't find a "download" button. You’ll probably want to full screen it. Fullscreen mode is disabled. You probably need something like allowfullscreen="true" in your embed code. Am I missing a joke? Or is it just broken?
- adnam 18y agohttp://www.docstoc.com/docs/1857261/Whiner-Jerkins-All-Hands-101308 http://www.docstoc.com/docs/1857261/Whiner-Jerkins-All-Hands...
- boredguy8 18y agoIt's the link underneath the flash.
- llimllib 18y agoIt's broken to me too; with flasblock + the debug version of flash installed, I couldn't get it to send me to the link posted by adnam.
- mattmaroon 18y agoIt was broken, but is now fixed. Sorry about that.
- jcapote 18y agoJust get it here: http://www.docstoc.com/docs/1857261/Whiner-Jerkins-All-Hands-101308 http://www.docstoc.com/docs/1857261/Whiner-Jerkins-All-Hands... It's flippin' hilarious
- MicahWedemeyer 18y agoMaybe the slides should be re-posted on scribd. Or maybe that would be just too ironic...
- mattmaroon 18y agoIt wasn't docstoc's fault, it was mine. But yeah, I shoulda used scribd. For some reason it just totally slipped my mind. I saw the Sequoia one on docstoc and just used it.
- sabat 18y agoFrakking hilarious, and close enough to reality to be kinda scary.
- rwebb 18y agopretty juvenile IMO. great bridge burning though. nailed that part.
- fallentimes 18y agoBut most of what he said was dead on. It just happened to be hilarious as well.
- rwebb 18y agomildly amusing, yes. dead on, no. like watching a train wreck in slow motion, yes.
- fallentimes 18y agoAre you trying to say Seesmic should have raised $50 million? :)
- rwebb 18y agonot at all
- raganwald 18y agoI give VCs and startup founders more credit than you do. If I met someone who blackballed Matt on the basis of a satire like this, I would wonder why they were being so insecure and/or vindictive. That being said, hang on a moment (waits 60s). Funny, no calls from VCs. I wonder if it was this: http://weblog.raganwald.com/2007/04/venture-capitalist-passes-away.html http://weblog.raganwald.com/2007/04/venture-capitalist-passe... Seriously, the people I know (probably many fewer than everyone else) are the types to laugh hardest at this stuff. I recall meeting with an investment banking boutique about writing valuation models for them. The partner told me that before getting to work I had to familiarize myself with the Code of Ethics for his profession. He handed me a heavy tome. I opened it, to find... blank pages! He laughed heartily. I can't see that guy spitting on Matt's shadow as they pass in the street.
- mattmaroon 18y agoSorry, it was working last night. Anyway, it's fixed now.
- qhoxie 18y agoFunny but also really solid commentary on the past and present. I have been amazed for years at the practices of some investors and founders. This sums things up very nicely.
- tdavis 18y agoAlthough I hold the title for most hilarious Keynote presentation, that was without a doubt the most amazing Powerpoint presentation ever devised by man. Amazing. Matt, have my babies. We'll work out the logistics.
- fallentimes 18y agoYou do? When? Love, Your Cofounder. P.S. If you mean the 2nd day of YC Demo Days in Cali, it's not a fair comparison because we didn't use powerpoint.
- tdavis 18y agoIt was a training refresher on advanced cover tactics in urban combat. I had people in tears. My NCOIC ordered me to convert it to Powerpoint so he could use it, hahaha. P.S. I wouldn't really have a place taking any credit for the laughs at our demos... I was laughing too since I had no idea what you were going to say.
- fallentimes 18y agoOr the crickets. Demo Day 1 in Cali - Ugh.
- unalone 18y agoAny chance of this being available for preview?
- tdavis 18y agoUnfortunately it requires a security clearance to view :\ When I left that country I didn't even have anything I could legally store it on so I don't even have it anymore. Because that would be a felony. And I never commit felonies. Or something.
- unalone 18y agoUnderstood. I wouldn't want you becoming a criminal. Or at least, not over that.
- ovi256 18y agoGreat work matt. You nailed just the right tone. I believed it was real right about until the end.
- SwellJoe 18y agoFact check: GOOG still has tons of cash. There's still a chance to get acquired by them!
- ChaitanyaSai 18y agoHilarious. Someone should do one about how the Web 2.0 denizens would go about with their life in a Depression. Tweeting from the government food lines, posting pictures of the day's crappy dished-out gruel on Flickr, posting Facebook updates of their hunger pangs and the number of pounds lost...quite a few possibilities.
- fallentimes 18y agoScoble?
- unalone 18y agoHe'd trim down the RSS feeds from 600 to 550.
- jcl 18y ago...selling Apples on streetcorners...
- hooande 18y agofunniest power point ever
- profgubler 18y agoThanks for the laugh. It is great to laugh at some of the silliness in investing. It helps keep everyone in check.
- unalone 18y agoExcellent. I'm not an MM fan, but this one made me chortle. For a while too long, I thought Whiner Jerkins sounded like a real company, so I didn't click this link. Fool me once...
- mattmaroon 18y agoHow can you not be an MM fan? That guy is great. :)
- unalone 18y agoI dunno. The third-person complimentary stuff he gets up to sometimes gets to be too much. :/ EDIT: No? No jokes today? I'm sorry.
- petesmithy 18y agogreat work matt
- edw519 18y agoCutting out an employee with $100k in salary is just as good as increasing revenues by $100k. Only if your margins are 100%. If your margins are 10% then cutting out that employee is just as good as increasing revenues by $1 million. Food for thought before any new hire.
- raganwald 18y agoIn other words, Cutting out an employee with $100k in salary is just as good as increasing net revenues by $100k.
- tyler 18y agoExcept not really. You hire an employee with the intentions that they'll be worth more to the company than the money the money they cost it. It could be more accurately stated as... Cutting out a _worthless_ employee with $100k in salary is just as good as blah blah blah. If the employee is not worth more than they cost the company you should not be hiring them recession or not.
- zandorg 18y agoA great take on the VC market, Kleiner Perkins I assume. Stuff moves so fast on the Web - it's just 2 years ago that I wanted to sell to Google, and now that's no longer an option. But I have other ideas up my sleeve which don't require Google acquiring them.