4 ms·

I’ve always felt the “coworkers can’t be your friends” argument was as silly as saying “school mates can’t be your friends.” Make friends where you make them.

yrgulation 4y ago
Of course they can be your friends. But demanding they leave their families behind to hold your hand in an office is creepy.
- toofy 4y ago
  no one is “demanding” someone “leave their families behind” to hold anyone’s hand in an office.
  - Mountain_Skies 4y ago
    The context here is of 'work from home' vs 'go to the office' because coworkers need you to socialize with them, so yes, some are indeed demanding that workers leave their families behind to come hold their hand in the office.
    - krona 4y ago
      Where I work, family time is family time and work time is work time. Working from home should very little difference, and if it persistently does then that's a problem.
      - ndriscoll 4y ago
        It's pretty normal for people to take breaks. The last office I worked in had video game consoles that people used during the day, or they'd go on a walk to get coffee. No one cares as long as people are getting their work done. Now that I work from home, I can take a break to go on a walk with my family, and we can eat lunch together. It's a huge difference even with no change in time spent working.
    - patch_cable 4y ago
      I don’t they’re saying you must go to the office because people need you to socializing them, I think they’re saying some people prefer the office because they have the opportunity to socialize. And at least for my part I was agreeing that these folks exist.
  - 6stringmerc 4y ago
    Actually it does happen and it is awful because those making the demands are really lame people that never grew out of high school mentality - all their work friends or school friends are their only friends. If you don’t join them you are to be expunged.
- unethical_ban 4y ago
  The snark in me wants to say "you live in a society". It's a free market of jobs. Want to be a yeoman, head to the farm.
  - pessimizer 4y ago
    > Want to be a yeoman, head to the farm. How about "Want a friend? Go find one. We're at work." Work is the only place where people who aren't wealthy can get their pay. Work, a place where people are locked in for 8 hours a day under pain of starvation and homelessness, is the only place where some minority of people can make "friends." We shouldn't tailor everything around those people, even though they're likely to be the most vocal.
    - unethical_ban 4y ago
      One of my arguments is that in the long term, full remote will hamper the ability for people to cross train, quickly pick up new skills, or network and be able to find new jobs effectively. I feels like you're saying "fuck you, I got mine" to new entrants to the field. I know wfh is great for others. It's terrible for others. No one is forcing you to do a thing. WFH is certainly here to stay for many companies.
vorpalhex 4y ago
And when you need to fire your friend, or report them for inappropriate behavior in the workplace, how is that going to go for you? What if you share something important with a coworker-friend and they dislike it? You are now stuck with that person.
- TexanFeller 4y ago
  I don’t want to be in management, so I just have to not report my friends’ inappropriate behavior. I wouldn’t do that to a friend anyway, short of something like murder.
  - vorpalhex 4y ago
    You wouldn't report someone for accepting bribes, falsifying paperwork or sexually harassing someone just because they are your friend?
    - TexanFeller 4y ago
      no.
- patch_cable 4y ago
  I think it is reasonably to maintain professional distance from your reports for that reason. I’m not sure what you mean by “something important” but I don’t think that’s significantly different than a risk you might take with a neighbor or a classmate. You can be stuck with those as well.

yrgulation 4y ago

Of course they can be your friends. But demanding they leave their families behind to hold your hand in an office is creepy.

toofy 4y ago
no one is “demanding” someone “leave their families behind” to hold anyone’s hand in an office.
- Mountain_Skies 4y ago
  The context here is of 'work from home' vs 'go to the office' because coworkers need you to socialize with them, so yes, some are indeed demanding that workers leave their families behind to come hold their hand in the office.
  - krona 4y ago
    Where I work, family time is family time and work time is work time. Working from home should very little difference, and if it persistently does then that's a problem.
    - ndriscoll 4y ago
      It's pretty normal for people to take breaks. The last office I worked in had video game consoles that people used during the day, or they'd go on a walk to get coffee. No one cares as long as people are getting their work done. Now that I work from home, I can take a break to go on a walk with my family, and we can eat lunch together. It's a huge difference even with no change in time spent working.
  - patch_cable 4y ago
    I don’t they’re saying you must go to the office because people need you to socializing them, I think they’re saying some people prefer the office because they have the opportunity to socialize. And at least for my part I was agreeing that these folks exist.
- 6stringmerc 4y ago
  Actually it does happen and it is awful because those making the demands are really lame people that never grew out of high school mentality - all their work friends or school friends are their only friends. If you don’t join them you are to be expunged.
unethical_ban 4y ago
The snark in me wants to say "you live in a society". It's a free market of jobs. Want to be a yeoman, head to the farm.
- pessimizer 4y ago
  > Want to be a yeoman, head to the farm. How about "Want a friend? Go find one. We're at work." Work is the only place where people who aren't wealthy can get their pay. Work, a place where people are locked in for 8 hours a day under pain of starvation and homelessness, is the only place where some minority of people can make "friends." We shouldn't tailor everything around those people, even though they're likely to be the most vocal.
  - unethical_ban 4y ago
    One of my arguments is that in the long term, full remote will hamper the ability for people to cross train, quickly pick up new skills, or network and be able to find new jobs effectively. I feels like you're saying "fuck you, I got mine" to new entrants to the field. I know wfh is great for others. It's terrible for others. No one is forcing you to do a thing. WFH is certainly here to stay for many companies.

vorpalhex 4y ago

And when you need to fire your friend, or report them for inappropriate behavior in the workplace, how is that going to go for you? What if you share something important with a coworker-friend and they dislike it? You are now stuck with that person.

TexanFeller 4y ago
I don’t want to be in management, so I just have to not report my friends’ inappropriate behavior. I wouldn’t do that to a friend anyway, short of something like murder.
- vorpalhex 4y ago
  You wouldn't report someone for accepting bribes, falsifying paperwork or sexually harassing someone just because they are your friend?
  - TexanFeller 4y ago
    no.
patch_cable 4y ago
I think it is reasonably to maintain professional distance from your reports for that reason. I’m not sure what you mean by “something important” but I don’t think that’s significantly different than a risk you might take with a neighbor or a classmate. You can be stuck with those as well.