Is the content of your comment that you are explaining ad hominem to me and that vanderZwan's question requires mutual trust? Yes, I fully understand this. The

Is the content of your comment that you are explaining ad hominem to me and that vanderZwan's question requires mutual trust? Yes, I fully understand this. The only thing I am trusting here is that vanderZwan is trying to accurately report their experiences. I trust, since they say it is done in good-faith discussions, that they are sensitive to the risk of this being perceived as being ad hominem and that in-person they ask the question in an appropriate way. To be clear, I never said that I would respond well to the question. My point is that it is a large leap to go from what vanderZwan said to that this is for the purpose of dismissing someone. Also to be clear, I think it's valid for P5fRxh5kUvp2th to think that this sort of question is well outside of what is ever respectful to ask. I just happen to think it's wrong to assume that disrespect is vanderZwan's intent.