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I would have benefitted greatly from taking the author's principles to heart when my career began 30+ years ago. I tend to be destructively critical. It has n
by randcraw 4y ago
I would have benefitted greatly from taking the author's principles to heart when my career began 30+ years ago. I tend to be destructively critical. It has not served me well.
The article makes a couple excellent points: 1) assure the listener that you both seek the same goal, 2) provide a solution, not just more problems.
Negativity alone is poison. If you don't have better ideas to replace the ones you shoot down, say nothing. Nobody likes troublemakers.
It also took me much too long to realize that most people enjoy debate far less than I do, especially those who need to act ASAP, like bosses.
- Bakary 4y agoIt's not that people don't enjoy debate, it's that it's never just debate that's happening. Usually it's about attention-seeking, ego-feeding, controlling interactions, pleasure from ranting, and so on. It's similar to people who claim that they "tell it like it is". We understand what it means in practice and what sort of personality type to expect.
- WastingMyTime89 4y agoYou can disagree without being a troublemaker. Managers disagree amongst themselves all the time. Sometimes you have to disagree. Disagreeing doesn’t mean actively fighting things. I once spent six months disagreeing with my own customer about the validity of a planning and the ability of our suppliers to hit the deadlines they were announcing. People were very happy I had insisted on contingency plans when it became obvious the project was indeed going to be late.