I have been through the wringer in the mental health system, and only 3 years ago did I discover the true genesis of my condition. My parents began shuffling m

I have been through the wringer in the mental health system, and only 3 years ago did I discover the true genesis of my condition. My parents began shuffling me into therapists when I was about 8 years old. It wasn't really effective because we were all resistant to it: admitting problems, wanting to change, sticking to a course of treatment. So it continued and I was put on SSRIs when I was 21. I loathed that development. I was further hospitalized and put on mood stabilizers a few years later. Needless to say, that was even more detrimental: I still didn't know why I was like this. Receiving a diagnosis of bipolar disorder was weird; they explained the chemical imbalance fairy tale and the way drugs would help, and they explained how many famous people throughout history had also suffered from this scourge, so I suppose I was supposed to feel like I was in good company. But it was unsatisfying, because if I had a mere mood disorder, why was my life so profoundly messed up? Just because I had a few bouts of sleepless nights? Fast forward to 3 years ago and I had a series of revelations which indicated significant and enduring childhood trauma and abuse. I landed on a diagnosis which isn't in the DSM and can't be medicated. That has been satisfying, because now I was equipped to both reject the drugs and work on the issues at the root of my profound anguish. "Bipolar disorder" is a silly catch-all description. It's a collection of behaviors and "symptoms" that can't be clinically tested, it's just a label to slap onto people so that they can be drugged and checkboxes can be ticked in a treatment plan by providers and your insurance (if any). If they're telling you that you're "bipolar" and they're trying to drug you and you're unsatisfied with that prognosis, then good! I encourage you to dig deeper and explore the root causes. You'll need to trust and commit to good therapists. For me, my faith in Jesus Christ as savior has made all the difference, and that's actually a gift which my adoptive parents gave me alongside everything else, so thank God for that!