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I must be unusual but I've never (within memory) had negative self talk. When I first heard about it, I thought people were joking, as in, why would someone wil

• klyrs 4y ago
  My dad was hyper-critical and verbally abusive. My negative self talk is in his voice, using his language. I can't speak for everybody else, but for me the question of "why" seems rather straightforward. Unlearning that is hard. You probably make mistakes from time to time, as do I. Only, that's an invitation for my dad to show up with some useless invective. It's completely involuntary, and I eventually learned to fight back -- essentially, telling my dad to shut up and go to hell -- and that's what helped me reduce it to near zero. The sad thing is that my dad was a pretty cool guy, if we ignore the bad, and I liked him a lot. But the good parts of him don't live on in my subconscious in such a visceral way.
• porknubbins 4y ago
  I grew up in a perfectionist and competitive environment. Its not that people were overtly negative to each other- but imagine if you only received compliments that imply you were previously somehow inadequate- “did you lose weight” or “I like your new haircut”. You internalize that there is a very narrow path to being accepted by your community.