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The word "cavalier" may literally have been invented to describe this. Riders as a type are very difficult to intimidate because they are confident in the uniqu

The word "cavalier" may literally have been invented to describe this. Riders as a type are very difficult to intimidate because they are confident in the uniqueness of their experience. What we percieve as class itself may really just be an orientation to uncertainty, growth, and risk. I hear it described as money, education, and manners, but no combination of these is either sufficient or necessary for the natural deference that people and even animals offer to each other in recognition of this quality. Even though I actually believe physical competence is a moral virtue, that class can be taught, and parents who have become elevated by their experiences pass this on to their children, as they absolutely should, the article could also have concluded equivalently that, "People in middle classes have an exaggerated belief that their perceptions of competence matter." Class isn't a ladder. If it were, there would be rungs between the middle and the top. There are none. Just as you don't become accepted as respectably middle class among professors, administrators, or media types by being the best plumber or landscaper, there is no amount of money or education that will make you free if you haven't chosen it. The confidence comes from experience that gives you the option of declining unfavourable offers, something I call "no, thank you"-money. But the real secret is it's not money, it's just a matter of being in posession of something priceless.

savryn 4y ago
okay you've convinced me therapy is lame and I need a horsie instead :) I was just watching a video of the Monty Roberts method and the combination of dignity and gentleness seems at the essence of his fast taming. No cruelty or exhaustion like the old "breaking" stuff I had assumed from movies. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smN9yebcibc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smN9yebcibc "to blame a horse for anything is like blaming the night for being dark. It is their nature, they can not lie, they can't make anything up, and the only thing they want in life is to survive and reproduce and to be safe" Amazing how simple the old man's moves are, just turning to side, waiting calmly, presence. A lot of dysregulated people have forgotten the patience/playfulness of this basic dance with human strangers, constantly either over-asserting or over-withdrawing, sulking or lashing out based on language games in their head :( (to bring it back, upper-class people don't fidget or squirm much, their 'comportment' is calm body language, easy posture and readied social phrases)
- motohagiography 4y ago
  I'd recommend finding an instructor who can be a true mentor, shop around. Put off buying a horse until you can afford to actually own land. Being a rider and an owner are different things. I don't know the natural horsemanship / western scene at all, but if you find someone with a good rep in the classical school in your area, you're probably in good hands. The training systems are for producing interchangeable sport animals, which makes them fit for purpose, but if you are more philosophical, see if you can find someone who trained with or whose trainer studied under Oliviera or Schultheis or is connected to one of the 4 schools (quatre l'ecole equestre). If they are within a couple degrees of separation, that's a good foundation, then you can get a sport coach to develop you personally. Of course, you could just do it for fun and find joy in whatever you do, which is what a normal and reasonable person would do, and giving a good life to an animal is the most noble thing of all, but in the spirit of HN deep nerd, these are the hardest paths. Apprenticeship takes a decade at least, and failing means you just get to begin to appreciate what these people and horses do. The olympics and competition are absolutely worthy of total respect, but in the same vein, judged gamesmanship isn't philosophy either. That's easy to say, and yet more words from people who haven't competed, and arguably opinions are what one has when one doesn't have medals, but these are the converstions of the people in the arena. It's an addiction only death or poverty can cure, so be warned. But otherwise, it's a lifelong journey. Good luck. :)

savryn 4y ago

okay you've convinced me therapy is lame and I need a horsie instead :) I was just watching a video of the Monty Roberts method and the combination of dignity and gentleness seems at the essence of his fast taming. No cruelty or exhaustion like the old "breaking" stuff I had assumed from movies. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smN9yebcibc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smN9yebcibc "to blame a horse for anything is like blaming the night for being dark. It is their nature, they can not lie, they can't make anything up, and the only thing they want in life is to survive and reproduce and to be safe" Amazing how simple the old man's moves are, just turning to side, waiting calmly, presence. A lot of dysregulated people have forgotten the patience/playfulness of this basic dance with human strangers, constantly either over-asserting or over-withdrawing, sulking or lashing out based on language games in their head :( (to bring it back, upper-class people don't fidget or squirm much, their 'comportment' is calm body language, easy posture and readied social phrases)

motohagiography 4y ago
I'd recommend finding an instructor who can be a true mentor, shop around. Put off buying a horse until you can afford to actually own land. Being a rider and an owner are different things. I don't know the natural horsemanship / western scene at all, but if you find someone with a good rep in the classical school in your area, you're probably in good hands. The training systems are for producing interchangeable sport animals, which makes them fit for purpose, but if you are more philosophical, see if you can find someone who trained with or whose trainer studied under Oliviera or Schultheis or is connected to one of the 4 schools (quatre l'ecole equestre). If they are within a couple degrees of separation, that's a good foundation, then you can get a sport coach to develop you personally. Of course, you could just do it for fun and find joy in whatever you do, which is what a normal and reasonable person would do, and giving a good life to an animal is the most noble thing of all, but in the spirit of HN deep nerd, these are the hardest paths. Apprenticeship takes a decade at least, and failing means you just get to begin to appreciate what these people and horses do. The olympics and competition are absolutely worthy of total respect, but in the same vein, judged gamesmanship isn't philosophy either. That's easy to say, and yet more words from people who haven't competed, and arguably opinions are what one has when one doesn't have medals, but these are the converstions of the people in the arena. It's an addiction only death or poverty can cure, so be warned. But otherwise, it's a lifelong journey. Good luck. :)