Turn off your phone in the mall? Yea, right. Now there's great advice from someone who's in touch with modern reality: 1985 - If I don't see you again, I'll fi

Turn off your phone in the mall? Yea, right. Now there's great advice from someone who's in touch with modern reality: 1985 - If I don't see you again, I'll figure you ran into your friends and went home with them. 1989 - Meet me at the fountain at 6:00. 1992 - If you need anything, see Linda at the Gap. She'll know where to find me. 1996 - If there's an emergency, beep me and go to mall security. 1999 - Find a payphone and call my mobile phone when you get hungry. 2003 - Call my cell when you're ready to leave. 2006 - Post any good bargains on my Facebook wall. 2008 - Follow me on Twitter to see what I'm up to every 7 minutes. 2009 - Foursquare will let you know where I'm at. 2010 - Just check the Groupon emails I sent you to see where I plan to shop. 2011 - Text me immediately if you see a line anywhere. It's probably an early unpublished Black Friday special and we should get into that line now. I'll stop by REI and buy a tent and sleeping bags; you get some protein bars and Gatorade.