4 ms·

Why should we put our mental health on the line for this industry? There must be other jobs that are fulfilling and pay the bills.

targ65 4y ago
whose bills though? most people find one of the most high paying jobs they can, then adjust their lifestyle to that income, then if they miss the mark ('lowball offer') they have to keep looking. lifestyle regression is exceptionally hard for humans, especially if your friends/neighbors don't have to go through the same thing (e.g. there's no war raging in your country). the best thing to do would be to keep your spend way below your means. this maximizes your options and gives you choice. but who does that?
- allendoerfer 4y ago
  > the best thing to do would be to keep your spend way below your means. this maximizes your options and gives you choice. but who does that? Many do. The FIRE movement shows this.
- bittercynic 4y ago
  <raises hand> My spouse and I have household income around the median for the area, and through a combination of discipline and good luck have managed to keep expenses very low. It's not a life of depravation. We take nice vacations and buy the things we want, but we have to be careful not to want things like fancy cars or elaborate remodels. These seem like very unimportant things to forego when you stand to gain freedom from monetary worry.
- yibg 4y ago
  I’ve found keeping expenses well below my means provide a great sense of freedom and autonomy. I don’t need to stay at a job I don’t enjoy and not having work means it’s not a big stressor. It also means I can be selective in the job I do end up taking instead of worry about not being able to pay the bills if I’m out of work too long.
  - raffraffraff 4y ago
    This. But it really depends where you live and when (or if) you bought a house. I live in a city that has very expensive housing but bought in 2011 just before the prices corrected after the 2007/2008 crash. That single choice was the biggest we made. But aside from that, for ethical and lifestyle reasons, we are frugal. We use old phones and laptops, a 10 year old TV, don't fly, don't own a car and don't have kids. Result is that the house is paid off and we have enough in the bank to walk out on any job and remain funemployed for months (or more). You might think our lifestyle sounds boring, but when you remove stress and worry, you realise that a simple life can be a very happy one. A job you like, gardening, board games, long walks, DIY, cooking... None of it needs to cost much. I think that people who live with worry and stress desperately need to escape on holidays and reward themselves with expensive purchases (new cars/tech/fashion) to keep their spirits up and make it seem like the huge effort is worthwhile.
    - mostertoaster 4y ago
      I mean it sounds comfortable, and minimally stressful, but if it’s not that you can’t have kids, you should start a family. You’re now in such a good position to do it! Then your life can be chaotic, messy, stressful, and you lose much freedom for many years! But on the plus side you learn to sacrifice everything you’ve done and earned for the good of children who don’t even know how to appreciate it!
      - 411111111111111 4y ago
        How about you let them worry about what they wanna do?
      - raffraffraff 4y ago
        We never wanted kids (we're mid 40s, it won't change). We spend time with nephews and nieces, and while it can be fun, we're always very thankful we can return to a calm house with two sleeping dogs and no mess. My wife is even less interested in kids than I am. Lucky it worked out that way, plenty of couples break up over that choice.
- Loic 4y ago
  Family of five, two engineers in Germany (normal engineers salaries there, nothing really big), we live with 1.1 to 1.2 salary. And we enjoy our life, we rent (luckily not too expensive) and can do what we want. Of course we do not play the traditional "show off your nice stuff" game the society tries to force us into, but for us happiness is time well spent, not accumulated stuff.
- mbrodersen 4y ago
  I keep my expenses 20% below net income and invest the rest on the stock market. It is a great anti-stress way to live. Happiness is all about your expectations and who you compare yourself with. I try my best to compare myself with myself 1 year ago instead of random strangers. It makes me focus on what I can actually control (my own actions) instead of things I can’t control (the actions of others). If you can’t help comparing yourself with your neighbours and feel “poor” where you live then moved to a place where you are “rich” compared with the neighbours. It will do wonders for your happiness.
SOLAR_FIELDS 4y ago
How many of those jobs pay just as much or more as a medical doctor for a fraction of the education and arguably quite a bit less stress? I’m not a fan of the interview process at all and not defending it at all, but when you compare it to “other jobs”, it’s very clear that most software engineers (in the states at least) are compensated quite well
benjaminwootton 4y ago
There aren’t many industries which are as easy to access whilst paying between $100k and $skys_the_limit.

targ65 4y ago

whose bills though? most people find one of the most high paying jobs they can, then adjust their lifestyle to that income, then if they miss the mark ('lowball offer') they have to keep looking. lifestyle regression is exceptionally hard for humans, especially if your friends/neighbors don't have to go through the same thing (e.g. there's no war raging in your country). the best thing to do would be to keep your spend way below your means. this maximizes your options and gives you choice. but who does that?

allendoerfer 4y ago
> the best thing to do would be to keep your spend way below your means. this maximizes your options and gives you choice. but who does that? Many do. The FIRE movement shows this.
bittercynic 4y ago
<raises hand> My spouse and I have household income around the median for the area, and through a combination of discipline and good luck have managed to keep expenses very low. It's not a life of depravation. We take nice vacations and buy the things we want, but we have to be careful not to want things like fancy cars or elaborate remodels. These seem like very unimportant things to forego when you stand to gain freedom from monetary worry.
yibg 4y ago
I’ve found keeping expenses well below my means provide a great sense of freedom and autonomy. I don’t need to stay at a job I don’t enjoy and not having work means it’s not a big stressor. It also means I can be selective in the job I do end up taking instead of worry about not being able to pay the bills if I’m out of work too long.
- raffraffraff 4y ago
  This. But it really depends where you live and when (or if) you bought a house. I live in a city that has very expensive housing but bought in 2011 just before the prices corrected after the 2007/2008 crash. That single choice was the biggest we made. But aside from that, for ethical and lifestyle reasons, we are frugal. We use old phones and laptops, a 10 year old TV, don't fly, don't own a car and don't have kids. Result is that the house is paid off and we have enough in the bank to walk out on any job and remain funemployed for months (or more). You might think our lifestyle sounds boring, but when you remove stress and worry, you realise that a simple life can be a very happy one. A job you like, gardening, board games, long walks, DIY, cooking... None of it needs to cost much. I think that people who live with worry and stress desperately need to escape on holidays and reward themselves with expensive purchases (new cars/tech/fashion) to keep their spirits up and make it seem like the huge effort is worthwhile.
  - mostertoaster 4y ago
    I mean it sounds comfortable, and minimally stressful, but if it’s not that you can’t have kids, you should start a family. You’re now in such a good position to do it! Then your life can be chaotic, messy, stressful, and you lose much freedom for many years! But on the plus side you learn to sacrifice everything you’ve done and earned for the good of children who don’t even know how to appreciate it!
    - 411111111111111 4y ago
      How about you let them worry about what they wanna do?
    - raffraffraff 4y ago
      We never wanted kids (we're mid 40s, it won't change). We spend time with nephews and nieces, and while it can be fun, we're always very thankful we can return to a calm house with two sleeping dogs and no mess. My wife is even less interested in kids than I am. Lucky it worked out that way, plenty of couples break up over that choice.
Loic 4y ago
Family of five, two engineers in Germany (normal engineers salaries there, nothing really big), we live with 1.1 to 1.2 salary. And we enjoy our life, we rent (luckily not too expensive) and can do what we want. Of course we do not play the traditional "show off your nice stuff" game the society tries to force us into, but for us happiness is time well spent, not accumulated stuff.
mbrodersen 4y ago
I keep my expenses 20% below net income and invest the rest on the stock market. It is a great anti-stress way to live. Happiness is all about your expectations and who you compare yourself with. I try my best to compare myself with myself 1 year ago instead of random strangers. It makes me focus on what I can actually control (my own actions) instead of things I can’t control (the actions of others). If you can’t help comparing yourself with your neighbours and feel “poor” where you live then moved to a place where you are “rich” compared with the neighbours. It will do wonders for your happiness.

SOLAR_FIELDS 4y ago

How many of those jobs pay just as much or more as a medical doctor for a fraction of the education and arguably quite a bit less stress? I’m not a fan of the interview process at all and not defending it at all, but when you compare it to “other jobs”, it’s very clear that most software engineers (in the states at least) are compensated quite well

benjaminwootton 4y ago

There aren’t many industries which are as easy to access whilst paying between $100k and $skys_the_limit.