4 ms·

i feel like in current culture its considered kind of creepy to approach women in a non-party social context like hackathon they often complain they are made t

i feel like in current culture its considered kind of creepy to approach women in a non-party social context like hackathon they often complain they are made to feel uncomfortable by that

jhanschoo 4y ago
In non-party social contexts consider becoming friends first approaching either sex with the same questions you'd ask people sharing the same interests. Then ask for contacts to share and receive opportunities for similar events. Then deepen your friendship and get to know each other better asking about events outside your groups' interests but more of pairwise mutual interest.
- dmatech 4y ago
  Whether this comes across as stalking or courting depends on how weird or creepy you come across. Basically, once you leave university, your ability to spend a lot of time with people you're allowed to date kind of dries up, because people don't want to be counted at work.
  - jhanschoo 4y ago
    I'm sorry, but the early-mid steps what I described is completely how you make friends and close friends as well. If someone is in a social context and take offense with people trying to be friends, they are the problem.
sleepdreamy 4y ago
How you 'feel' isn't always reality. I am not dating now, but it's a bit odd to suggest you can't put yourself out there because of the 'climate' or 'culture'. Who cares what the climate is, if you're being genuine and nice there is nothing to worry about. If you're worried you will be perceived as a creep then you need to work on your delivery/how you approach strangers. Members of the opposite sex are just people. They want to be treated normally. My most successful male friend(in terms of dating) just treats females like they're normal people. He pretty much never has trouble and he is a 6 at most with a shitbox car. I used to think women only care about money etc; and That is true..for a certain subset of women. So many more don't care at all, and just want a nice loyal person who won't shit on them. And yes, you need to moderately TRY to look attractive. Go to the gym, get a proper haircut, stop wearing those shitty jeans and ugly shoes. YOU also need to put in effort, it's not just on the other gender.
- orangepurple 4y ago
  > Members of the opposite sex are just people. They want to be treated normally. My most successful male friend(in terms of dating) just treats females like they're normal people. He pretty much never has trouble and he is a 6 at most with a shitbox car. Just a suggestion. You think he is a "6" but you are probably wrong because you are unable to view him from the perspective of a woman's gaze. See my other post in my profile's comments about the flow chart stuff.
  - sleepdreamy 4y ago
    I did even better than him when I was dating and am objectively more attractive in many ways. So no, I am not wrong. He is a solid 6. lmao. I appreciate your input though!
bombcar 4y ago
If you're only interested in talking to the person if they're a potential partner, you're going to have a lot of failures (unless it's something like a speed dating course). You work on getting to know people as friends, some of whom you may consider dating.

i feel like in current culture its considered kind of creepy to approach women in a non-party social context like hackathon they often complain they are made to feel uncomfortable by that

jhanschoo 4y ago

In non-party social contexts consider becoming friends first approaching either sex with the same questions you'd ask people sharing the same interests. Then ask for contacts to share and receive opportunities for similar events. Then deepen your friendship and get to know each other better asking about events outside your groups' interests but more of pairwise mutual interest.

dmatech 4y ago
Whether this comes across as stalking or courting depends on how weird or creepy you come across. Basically, once you leave university, your ability to spend a lot of time with people you're allowed to date kind of dries up, because people don't want to be counted at work.
- jhanschoo 4y ago
  I'm sorry, but the early-mid steps what I described is completely how you make friends and close friends as well. If someone is in a social context and take offense with people trying to be friends, they are the problem.

sleepdreamy 4y ago

How you 'feel' isn't always reality. I am not dating now, but it's a bit odd to suggest you can't put yourself out there because of the 'climate' or 'culture'. Who cares what the climate is, if you're being genuine and nice there is nothing to worry about. If you're worried you will be perceived as a creep then you need to work on your delivery/how you approach strangers. Members of the opposite sex are just people. They want to be treated normally. My most successful male friend(in terms of dating) just treats females like they're normal people. He pretty much never has trouble and he is a 6 at most with a shitbox car. I used to think women only care about money etc; and That is true..for a certain subset of women. So many more don't care at all, and just want a nice loyal person who won't shit on them. And yes, you need to moderately TRY to look attractive. Go to the gym, get a proper haircut, stop wearing those shitty jeans and ugly shoes. YOU also need to put in effort, it's not just on the other gender.

orangepurple 4y ago
> Members of the opposite sex are just people. They want to be treated normally. My most successful male friend(in terms of dating) just treats females like they're normal people. He pretty much never has trouble and he is a 6 at most with a shitbox car. Just a suggestion. You think he is a "6" but you are probably wrong because you are unable to view him from the perspective of a woman's gaze. See my other post in my profile's comments about the flow chart stuff.
- sleepdreamy 4y ago
  I did even better than him when I was dating and am objectively more attractive in many ways. So no, I am not wrong. He is a solid 6. lmao. I appreciate your input though!

bombcar 4y ago

If you're only interested in talking to the person if they're a potential partner, you're going to have a lot of failures (unless it's something like a speed dating course). You work on getting to know people as friends, some of whom you may consider dating.