A few thoughts: - Do you actually want to do all that engineering, or do you just want to be like Carmack, having done all that engineering? Would you be okay

A few thoughts: - Do you actually want to do all that engineering, or do you just want to be like Carmack, having done all that engineering? Would you be okay with having been similarly productive as him, but not having the commensurate rewards in return? - Carmack isn't on a higher plane of existence. He still has to shit, still has to arrange to have dinner every day. As per his own recent admission, he still gets distracted and has to modify his environment to cope with that. - Much like the protagonist in the Bell Jar, you are focusing only on the alternative time streams that appear to you as better. In reality, there are tons of far worse outcomes that you have successfully avoided, but Western culture encourages us to ignore these entirely. - Humans are notoriously bad at evaluating their own future emotional states in response to life events. - Fam, you are 23. All else being equal? I would pick being you over being a legendary and wealthy 50+ year old programmer. No offense to the greybeards reading this passage.