Embrace your truth. You're a people person not a tech genius. That actually has huge value in the tech world because you know enough about tech to get some cred

Embrace your truth. You're a people person not a tech genius. That actually has huge value in the tech world because you know enough about tech to get some credibility. I don't know why your goal would be to become a better engineer at this point, your goal should be to become a better manager. There's probably politics involved, you need to read the tea leaves and figure out how to get promoted. But it's not by suddenly getting hacker fever in your 40s. If you never had it before, you're not going to get it now. The main thing holding you back is your imposter syndrome. That's all I can say of your earlier work where engineering was more critical. Just drop it, admit you're a mediocre engineer but have confidence that you're a people person and be proud of that. Someone I know quite well did just this at 50, got a Fang job with a Fang salary and is having a great time. He never really liked coding, he just fell into it because he's smart. You're not the only one. You just need to learn to lead with your strengths and stop perseverating about what you're not great at.