4 ms·

You've invested a lot into this - I can tell you that your friendship will never quite be the same. Still, try to keep it, as 10 years is quite an investment.

by Spyckie 18y ago

You've invested a lot into this - I can tell you that your friendship will never quite be the same. Still, try to keep it, as 10 years is quite an investment. Read up on his personality type. MBTI has helped me figure out why I can't get motivated on projects, and although it may not give you answers, it may open up some clues about why he's not interested. My thoughts? He's a dreamer (IP?)... loves to come up with ideas, but gets bored quickly with details and implementation. He also doesn't seem to have a lot experience programming - the barrier to him sitting down and writing code is much too high for someone who is proficient. It sounds like he needs a couple of years of work experience in a company or a real job before he's ready to tackle the entrepreneur world. If you're going to let him go, don't corner him is my only advice I can give. Tell him that he's a smart person, but he's not yet ready for entrepreneurial life. I think he needs to hear that. Offer him a good writeup for his resume if he is going to look for a job. I wouldn't spend money to buy him out... to me it would build up financial resentment that wouldn't be good for the relationship. It sounds like you already have some frustration. If he's a valuable friend, he'll understand and grow from this experience, and you guys can try again later when he's gone through a bit more of life. If he is unwilling to cooperate or touchy about money, don't hesitate to probe - ask him about his financial situation, his thoughts on his career, his current confidence level, etc... that will probably reveal a lot about him that you may not have known. A lot of his type get attracted to entrepreneurship because of the freedom of life that it 'offers', but once they actually start something, it quickly becomes too fast and much too stressful. There's a vicious loop of thought that some people go through - the chance to strike it rich constantly fights with the too fast-pace/work intensive life that is a startup. It's not burnout - it leaves most of us paralyzed. That may be what he's going through.

DabAsteroid 18y ago
A lot of his type get attracted to entrepreneurship because of the freedom of life that it 'offers' Angel investor Dave Berkus talks about the "freedom dream", also, here (at the beginning of a 9:32 video): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3-ozlr_fYM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3-ozlr_fYM . I think there are the right reasons [that people become entrepreneurs] and the wrong reasons, and one of the things that I like to do is ferret out what those reasons are. So I have memories of, and stories of, entrepreneurs that I've asked that question to that suprised themselves when they had to answer it honestly, because usually people want to become an entrepreneur because of two things: they have a great idea, and they don't like the life they're in. So they envision this idea bringing them into a new life, where either they or somebody else finances their way into success. And then success means lifestyle changes. Success means freedom. And that's the usual dream. And, in fact, you [angel investor Frank Peters] and I both know from our years of entrepreneurial experience that, first of all, the lifestyle of an entrepreneur typically means longer days by far. The point is that you often mortgage your home, and if you don't you know that you're at risk from personal guarantees, and if you add all of the extra stress, along with the personal guarantees and the extra hours, entrepreneurism isn't necessarily the panacea that people think it is when they're looking at a good idea and thinking it's time to go do it. ... I look for passion. The whole thing gets down to passion. If they have that kind of passion, and the idea is good, then we move on to all the other more substantial things.

by Spyckie 18y ago

DabAsteroid 18y ago

A lot of his type get attracted to entrepreneurship because of the freedom of life that it 'offers' Angel investor Dave Berkus talks about the "freedom dream", also, here (at the beginning of a 9:32 video): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3-ozlr_fYM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3-ozlr_fYM . I think there are the right reasons [that people become entrepreneurs] and the wrong reasons, and one of the things that I like to do is ferret out what those reasons are. So I have memories of, and stories of, entrepreneurs that I've asked that question to that suprised themselves when they had to answer it honestly, because usually people want to become an entrepreneur because of two things: they have a great idea, and they don't like the life they're in. So they envision this idea bringing them into a new life, where either they or somebody else finances their way into success. And then success means lifestyle changes. Success means freedom. And that's the usual dream. And, in fact, you [angel investor Frank Peters] and I both know from our years of entrepreneurial experience that, first of all, the lifestyle of an entrepreneur typically means longer days by far. The point is that you often mortgage your home, and if you don't you know that you're at risk from personal guarantees, and if you add all of the extra stress, along with the personal guarantees and the extra hours, entrepreneurism isn't necessarily the panacea that people think it is when they're looking at a good idea and thinking it's time to go do it. ... I look for passion. The whole thing gets down to passion. If they have that kind of passion, and the idea is good, then we move on to all the other more substantial things.