... and then it's an even bigger impediment to sharing responsibility for children, as you try to move seats around or make sure grandparents have duplicate equ

... and then it's an even bigger impediment to sharing responsibility for children, as you try to move seats around or make sure grandparents have duplicate equipment. Hard to spontaneously have another parent bring a kid home from school. We had to get special car seats to carpool with my sister, just so we could fit it all in. These psychological safety burdens - and accompanying negotiations between caretakers - make it so hard to provide mutual aid. We're lucky to have found other parents with similar understandings, but the moralizing on safety makes it hard to even discuss.