5 ms·

It's all about the culture of your location. In New York City, 35 is young and vibrant and full of life.

TuringTest 4y ago
I came here to say this. 'Midlife' is not about how long do you live, it's about how advanced you are in the expectations of the social life script, after 'raving youth' and 'settled elderly'.
- a9h74j 4y ago
  Some cultures have four-part scripts, some three -- not all two. I once read a book about Ulyssean aging, IIRC. It described persons such as Thor Hyerdal who in essence started new lives (full of recognized accomplishment) near age 60.
Swizec 4y ago
Yeah I'm 34 in SF, turning 35 this autumn, and feeling like I'm literally in my prime. Old enough to have matured, experienced enough to have some good battle scars, young and energetic enough that there's decades of quality life ahead of me. The mindset stability that came in the past few years has been nice. Hustling for the shiniest immediate goal in sight no longer appeals, but there's plenty of energy to go after long-term goals in ridiculously effective ways. The sort of laser focus and disregard for extraneous bullshit that 10 years ago I couldn't even imagine was possible. It's nice. Life is barely getting started.
- foobiekr 4y ago
  A friend died at 51 not long ago. If you die at is age, you are already 68% of the way there. It's not barely getting started, it's behind you. More realistically, a man who is 35 years old has a life expectancy of another 43 years, so not quite there yet.
  - Swizec 4y ago
    Sure but the effectiveness of upcoming years seems much higher. Where I used to toil for 10 hours to do something, I can do the same thing now in 1 hour. Resources are higher too. For lots of things that used to take time, I can just pay someone. And lets not forget I spent the first 10 to 15 years being basically useless.
  - Mezzie 4y ago
    > More realistically, a man who is 35 years old has a life expectancy of another 43 years, so not quite there yet. It's crazy how much this can vary. I'm 34, but I'm female and from a family where multiple people have lived to be over 110. I've always estimated my 'mid life'/halfway mark to be about 45.
- hondo77 4y ago
  > Yeah I'm 34...and feeling like I'm literally in my prime. You are. Most people don't realize that until they're in their 40s.
  - fleddr 4y ago
    He's not. Assuming he's male, physical peak is near 26, intellectual peak early to mid 20s. This doesn't mean you can't learn new things nor does it mean your body isn't fit anymore, it just means you're already on the way down. It won't feel that way though, I understand.
    - wj 4y ago
      With age comes the wisdom on how to best apply the learning.
      - Mezzie 4y ago
        And the wisdom for deciding what is worth learning. Don't underestimate that effectiveness multiplier.
    - Swizec 4y ago
      > Assuming he's male, physical peak is near 26, My measurable physical stats are much better than they were at 26. Yes I notice junk food a little sooner and can't handle as much alcohol. But I can run a marathon faster, do better in the boxing ring, and can lift more weight with higher volume. The main physical drawback that I can see are slower reflexes. That comes out in the boxing ring when going against people 10+ years younger. > intellectual peak early to mid 20s. Depends what kind of intellectual peak you measure. My focus is better and more intense. My ability to learn new stuff has greatly increased because I have a bigger vaster framework to hang new knowledge onto. And I am infinitely better at solving difficult problems in a dumb easy way because I no longer care about showing off how smart I am. This not only makes my solutions easier to build, they're also easier to maintain so future me will have less work to do. What I'm probably less good at these days is waxing poetically about the sort of very deep thoughts that feel deep to a 25 year old. And pointless brain twisty puzzles that I was never good at anyway. I'd say these days, intellectually speaking, I'm more of a reliable orc that plows through problems with brute force, than an elf fleeting about using dexterity.
Jibbedeyeah 4y ago
I wonder if this is the result of being surrounded by so much marketing. Coincidentally, I read an article in the Economist about male fertility that said 35 is when a man's sperm starts to become less effective. So, slightly less than full of life, I would say.

I came here to say this. 'Midlife' is not about how long do you live, it's about how advanced you are in the expectations of the social life script, after 'raving youth' and 'settled elderly'.

a9h74j 4y ago
Some cultures have four-part scripts, some three -- not all two. I once read a book about Ulyssean aging, IIRC. It described persons such as Thor Hyerdal who in essence started new lives (full of recognized accomplishment) near age 60.

Swizec 4y ago

Yeah I'm 34 in SF, turning 35 this autumn, and feeling like I'm literally in my prime. Old enough to have matured, experienced enough to have some good battle scars, young and energetic enough that there's decades of quality life ahead of me. The mindset stability that came in the past few years has been nice. Hustling for the shiniest immediate goal in sight no longer appeals, but there's plenty of energy to go after long-term goals in ridiculously effective ways. The sort of laser focus and disregard for extraneous bullshit that 10 years ago I couldn't even imagine was possible. It's nice. Life is barely getting started.

foobiekr 4y ago
A friend died at 51 not long ago. If you die at is age, you are already 68% of the way there. It's not barely getting started, it's behind you. More realistically, a man who is 35 years old has a life expectancy of another 43 years, so not quite there yet.
- Swizec 4y ago
  Sure but the effectiveness of upcoming years seems much higher. Where I used to toil for 10 hours to do something, I can do the same thing now in 1 hour. Resources are higher too. For lots of things that used to take time, I can just pay someone. And lets not forget I spent the first 10 to 15 years being basically useless.
- Mezzie 4y ago
  > More realistically, a man who is 35 years old has a life expectancy of another 43 years, so not quite there yet. It's crazy how much this can vary. I'm 34, but I'm female and from a family where multiple people have lived to be over 110. I've always estimated my 'mid life'/halfway mark to be about 45.
hondo77 4y ago
> Yeah I'm 34...and feeling like I'm literally in my prime. You are. Most people don't realize that until they're in their 40s.
- fleddr 4y ago
  He's not. Assuming he's male, physical peak is near 26, intellectual peak early to mid 20s. This doesn't mean you can't learn new things nor does it mean your body isn't fit anymore, it just means you're already on the way down. It won't feel that way though, I understand.
  - wj 4y ago
    With age comes the wisdom on how to best apply the learning.
    - Mezzie 4y ago
      And the wisdom for deciding what is worth learning. Don't underestimate that effectiveness multiplier.
  - Swizec 4y ago
    > Assuming he's male, physical peak is near 26, My measurable physical stats are much better than they were at 26. Yes I notice junk food a little sooner and can't handle as much alcohol. But I can run a marathon faster, do better in the boxing ring, and can lift more weight with higher volume. The main physical drawback that I can see are slower reflexes. That comes out in the boxing ring when going against people 10+ years younger. > intellectual peak early to mid 20s. Depends what kind of intellectual peak you measure. My focus is better and more intense. My ability to learn new stuff has greatly increased because I have a bigger vaster framework to hang new knowledge onto. And I am infinitely better at solving difficult problems in a dumb easy way because I no longer care about showing off how smart I am. This not only makes my solutions easier to build, they're also easier to maintain so future me will have less work to do. What I'm probably less good at these days is waxing poetically about the sort of very deep thoughts that feel deep to a 25 year old. And pointless brain twisty puzzles that I was never good at anyway. I'd say these days, intellectually speaking, I'm more of a reliable orc that plows through problems with brute force, than an elf fleeting about using dexterity.

Jibbedeyeah 4y ago

I wonder if this is the result of being surrounded by so much marketing. Coincidentally, I read an article in the Economist about male fertility that said 35 is when a man's sperm starts to become less effective. So, slightly less than full of life, I would say.