Yep. Evolution was like, "Jeff ate a bad berry and he died. That's why Jeff is not your father. Make sure you stay the fuck away from any food that makes you si

Yep. Evolution was like, "Jeff ate a bad berry and he died. That's why Jeff is not your father. Make sure you stay the fuck away from any food that makes you sick; don't be like Jeff." It took me over a decade to even be able to eat another black-and-white cookie again. And it's not even just food, it's any painful experience. Pain is a great motivator for avoidance. When I was about 11, I had myringotomy tubes implanted in my eardrums -- a common procedure to help drain fluid in kids with chronic infections or, in my case, bad allergies. Thing is, when those tubes are in your ears, there's no barrier between your outer and inner ear, so you cannot get your ears wet. I was given custom-made ear plugs so I could still go in the pool, but they weren't as tightly sealed as they could have been, and chlorinated pool water would still leak in sometimes... fun fact: if you think chlorine burns your eyes, imagine how it feels dripping into your inner ear and down your eustachian tubes. During that time, I would get constant inner ear infections from pool water, and I'm talking the "extremely painful, pus-pouring, pressure-building, 'someone is stabbing my ears'" level of infections. I had the tubes surgically removed after I think about 2 years, and never had another ear infection after that, but it took me at least 5 years before I could put my head underwater without a conditioned, reflexive tensing and jerking of the neck trying to prevent it from happening.