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Technical, nerdy people are often combative in passive aggressive ways. Assuming a "I am the objective one" is often just a blindspot. Everyone is subjective t
by dalbasal 4y ago
Technical, nerdy people are often combative in passive aggressive ways.
Assuming a "I am the objective one" is often just a blindspot. Everyone is subjective to some extent, and admitting that you are a person with a perspective (as opposed to a neutral observer) is useful for avoiding such tensions.
Just admit that you have opinions, and present them as such.
"I am concerned that we are taking on a risky project, without understanding the implications. I would like to analytically discuss performance, and plan this product to these performance goals. I prefer an approach based on..."
Place yourself into the narrative. Not just other people.
- denton-scratch 4y ago> passive aggressive I think I know what that means; it's kind of pretending to be non-aggressive, while aggressing. I hope that, in a technical discussion, my adversary won't hold back. If they're angry, it's best for me if they tell me. Same if they're strongly opposed to my view. I don't want to have to guess where my adversary is coming from. We're not talking about dating, or getting on with the mother-in-law; it's about technical discussions. There's no reason you shouldn't be aggressive when presenting your view, and then get on fine with your adversary after the discussion's over.