Sorry I missed this. You are absolutely right. I personally am a child of abuse, and I have a lot of mixed reflections on it too. Things like, would I really

Sorry I missed this. You are absolutely right. I personally am a child of abuse, and I have a lot of mixed reflections on it too. Things like, would I really be who I was if I wasn't in that family, etc. And I think all of us learn to deal with the situation were are given (well, or if we don't, it seems like a pretty fast decline into maybe suicide, depression, drug abuse, etc). Now, all that being said, just because you may have a complex relationship with your abuser or your memories of the place or what happened, that doesn't make it any less wrong or more right. What really amazes me is that there are so many "poor" people in the world that really honestly live a great happy life, even though by American standards it might be not only considered poverty but injustice. Things that really seem to add to happiness are things like strong community, strong family ties, etc. But again, just because you are one part of the survivor bias doesn't change the moral problem with the original situation in my opinion. But to cycle back to the mixed reflections - people are stupidly complex and beautifully wonderfully diverse and brilliant in their own way. Some people (mostly in debates) try to argue "who would decide to knowingly believe a lie?", "who would do something so illogical?" but not only does it happen, it's probably the norm. My family is all still together, driving each other crazy into a cycle of codependence, which makes no sense, but doesn't make the abuse that goes on right. If anything, that complexity only make sit more dangerous.