5 ms·

Ask HN: How male dominated is your workplace and does it bother you?

I personally find it really annoying that my whole adult life I have to live in environments with upwards of 75% male over representation. Then again I never worked with women so I do not know what it is like. But for example, my social circle is much more gender balanced, and the atmosphere is much more pleasant when we are together. And I do not think it is because the people individually are different. I think it is just that in the workplace the is a lack of something to the social dynamics that women usually contribute.

Dracophoenix 4y ago
A workplace requires different motivations, skills, expectations, and goals from those of a friend group. The qualities that make for a good worker in a tech company aren't necessarily going to make for a good fit as a friend.
rmbyrro 4y ago
Perhaps another valid question is: should I bother about it?
- Wissenschaftler 4y ago
  That question is what everyone already asks, right? That is the usual discussion, that you should be bothered by workspace imbalance because sexism is still present and the patriarch is oppressing women ... etc, that is not what I am asking. I am asking what nobody asks. Does it bother the men themselves, that they have to work in a male dominated environment all the time.
  - rmbyrro 4y ago
    Personally, I think being bothered by that alone is indeed sexism. If I were "surrounded by men", they had traits I dislike and I wanted to discuss on HN, I'd talk about the traits, not the fact that they're men. It wouldn't bother more or less if they were male or female, because that would be sexism and prejudice. I see sexism and prejudice in this thread's comments: > men speak fast, often cut each other off and finish each other's sentences I know a lot of men who are the exact opposite. And people worried about sexism didn't call it out. Why not? Sexism is bad both ways. And you also see perfectly valid answers being downvoted (by who, I guess) because they don't conform to - I presume - the expected answer to your question: > Very female dominated. If you're a white male, chances of promotion are not nearly as good as others. Why was this downvoted? The person is answering the question.
hotpotamus 4y ago
The company I work at currently is probably about 50/50 with the men more in tech and the women more in admin/support type roles. Leadership leans a bit female with a lady as our CEO. It feels less like a psychopathic cult than most other places I’ve worked so I’d say that’s a plus.
superchroma 4y ago
Very male dominated. The culture is not good, men speak fast, often cut each other off and finish each other's sentences. There's a bit of blame and other negativity. I think women would probably find it uncomfortable if watching it on a TV. When there was a woman working with us, she was often put on a pedestal, given unequal room to talk but otherwise ignored and generally had lower expectations on her projects. I don't really know what to make of it, but probably we ought to change how we interact, as it's not approachable by someone who isn't also in a cutthroat mode where they are competing for airtime. I'm not sure why people treated a woman differently either; many of the men in the office have partners, I wonder if that was a factor.
- Wissenschaftler 4y ago
  I hate when other men turn everything into a competition. Like, we are discussing something during a coffee break, something completely unrelated to our work. Some men still cannot resist turning it into an argument that they have to win. I am not interested in that. I value truth and intellectual honestly much higher.
  - anon291 4y ago
    You should look for value in others traits instead of assuming the superiority of your own. While I personally am more like you, I recognize the value that competitive people bring to the table. Hating a group of people due to a personality characteristic is honestly a disservice to your own intellectual curiosity. Have you ever sought to understand why they are so competitive? Also a lot of this is rooted in internalized misandry. According to my wife women also turn everything into a competition. But of course, there's no competition between women and men because all competition is ultimately sexual in nature. Which is probably why men don't notice women's competitiveness.
- AnimalMuppet 4y ago
  > When there was a woman working with us, she was often put on a pedestal, given unequal room to talk but otherwise ignored and generally had lower expectations on her projects. We have very few women. But the one we have, she earned her pedestal. I was there when we interviewed her. In an interview, you ask questions to see how much the candidate knows. We started there, but with her we switched. Halfway through the interview, we started asking questions because we wanted to learn things. That was different - that's never happened with anyone else we've interviewed.
tamaharbor 4y ago
A major corporation I once worked for tried to convince us we were a family. We were not.
tomohawk 4y ago
Very female dominated. If you're a white male, chances of promotion are not nearly as good as others.
pksjoas 4y ago
Entirely male dominated except for our office manager / receptionist. But everyone is pleasant to work with so it's not a problem. Very different to when I worked for a FAANG which was full of highly competitive, ruthless, borderline psychopathic men. Was very glad to leave that nest of snakes.
kbrannigan 4y ago
Sometimes I ask what about nursing, kindergarten teachers. Do they have the same conversation? For being female dominated ? Are people trying to change it
- elashri 4y ago
  Or the other male dominated workplaces like constructions and farming.
anon291 4y ago
My workplace is mostly men. No it does not bother me. Men bring valuable traits to the workplace that have historically been shown to be quite effective to solve technical problems. No one's stopping women. And we have quite a few competent females as well, but it's mostly men. In my non work time I mostly socialize with other men. My wife and I will socialize with mixed groups obviously and I am friends with all my friends wives. But honestly a mixed sex friend group is not going to happen for me.
Mountain_Skies 4y ago
Your workplace is not your social circle, even if you do become friends with some of your co-workers. Until you can internalize that fact, you're going to continue to be unhappy.
gaws 4y ago
> How male dominated is your workplace Every job I've had is male dominated. > and does it bother you? No, because all the places I've worked at included mature coworkers who know how to act professionally in a workplace, especially toward women, who are often the minority but still have equal say and compensation.

Dracophoenix 4y ago

A workplace requires different motivations, skills, expectations, and goals from those of a friend group. The qualities that make for a good worker in a tech company aren't necessarily going to make for a good fit as a friend.

rmbyrro 4y ago

Perhaps another valid question is: should I bother about it?

Wissenschaftler 4y ago
That question is what everyone already asks, right? That is the usual discussion, that you should be bothered by workspace imbalance because sexism is still present and the patriarch is oppressing women ... etc, that is not what I am asking. I am asking what nobody asks. Does it bother the men themselves, that they have to work in a male dominated environment all the time.
- rmbyrro 4y ago
  Personally, I think being bothered by that alone is indeed sexism. If I were "surrounded by men", they had traits I dislike and I wanted to discuss on HN, I'd talk about the traits, not the fact that they're men. It wouldn't bother more or less if they were male or female, because that would be sexism and prejudice. I see sexism and prejudice in this thread's comments: > men speak fast, often cut each other off and finish each other's sentences I know a lot of men who are the exact opposite. And people worried about sexism didn't call it out. Why not? Sexism is bad both ways. And you also see perfectly valid answers being downvoted (by who, I guess) because they don't conform to - I presume - the expected answer to your question: > Very female dominated. If you're a white male, chances of promotion are not nearly as good as others. Why was this downvoted? The person is answering the question.

hotpotamus 4y ago

The company I work at currently is probably about 50/50 with the men more in tech and the women more in admin/support type roles. Leadership leans a bit female with a lady as our CEO. It feels less like a psychopathic cult than most other places I’ve worked so I’d say that’s a plus.

superchroma 4y ago

Very male dominated. The culture is not good, men speak fast, often cut each other off and finish each other's sentences. There's a bit of blame and other negativity. I think women would probably find it uncomfortable if watching it on a TV. When there was a woman working with us, she was often put on a pedestal, given unequal room to talk but otherwise ignored and generally had lower expectations on her projects. I don't really know what to make of it, but probably we ought to change how we interact, as it's not approachable by someone who isn't also in a cutthroat mode where they are competing for airtime. I'm not sure why people treated a woman differently either; many of the men in the office have partners, I wonder if that was a factor.

Wissenschaftler 4y ago
I hate when other men turn everything into a competition. Like, we are discussing something during a coffee break, something completely unrelated to our work. Some men still cannot resist turning it into an argument that they have to win. I am not interested in that. I value truth and intellectual honestly much higher.
- anon291 4y ago
  You should look for value in others traits instead of assuming the superiority of your own. While I personally am more like you, I recognize the value that competitive people bring to the table. Hating a group of people due to a personality characteristic is honestly a disservice to your own intellectual curiosity. Have you ever sought to understand why they are so competitive? Also a lot of this is rooted in internalized misandry. According to my wife women also turn everything into a competition. But of course, there's no competition between women and men because all competition is ultimately sexual in nature. Which is probably why men don't notice women's competitiveness.
AnimalMuppet 4y ago
> When there was a woman working with us, she was often put on a pedestal, given unequal room to talk but otherwise ignored and generally had lower expectations on her projects. We have very few women. But the one we have, she earned her pedestal. I was there when we interviewed her. In an interview, you ask questions to see how much the candidate knows. We started there, but with her we switched. Halfway through the interview, we started asking questions because we wanted to learn things. That was different - that's never happened with anyone else we've interviewed.

tamaharbor 4y ago

A major corporation I once worked for tried to convince us we were a family. We were not.

tomohawk 4y ago

Very female dominated. If you're a white male, chances of promotion are not nearly as good as others.

pksjoas 4y ago

Entirely male dominated except for our office manager / receptionist. But everyone is pleasant to work with so it's not a problem. Very different to when I worked for a FAANG which was full of highly competitive, ruthless, borderline psychopathic men. Was very glad to leave that nest of snakes.

kbrannigan 4y ago

Sometimes I ask what about nursing, kindergarten teachers. Do they have the same conversation? For being female dominated ? Are people trying to change it

elashri 4y ago
Or the other male dominated workplaces like constructions and farming.

anon291 4y ago

My workplace is mostly men. No it does not bother me. Men bring valuable traits to the workplace that have historically been shown to be quite effective to solve technical problems. No one's stopping women. And we have quite a few competent females as well, but it's mostly men. In my non work time I mostly socialize with other men. My wife and I will socialize with mixed groups obviously and I am friends with all my friends wives. But honestly a mixed sex friend group is not going to happen for me.

Mountain_Skies 4y ago

Your workplace is not your social circle, even if you do become friends with some of your co-workers. Until you can internalize that fact, you're going to continue to be unhappy.

gaws 4y ago

> How male dominated is your workplace Every job I've had is male dominated. > and does it bother you? No, because all the places I've worked at included mature coworkers who know how to act professionally in a workplace, especially toward women, who are often the minority but still have equal say and compensation.