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Okay, nuance et cetera, but can cheaters have the basic human decency to recognize that they're making a choice which is harmful to their family in order to ben
by civilized 4y ago
Okay, nuance et cetera, but can cheaters have the basic human decency to recognize that they're making a choice which is harmful to their family in order to benefit themselves? Or is that asking too much self-awareness?
- denton-scratch 4y agoReally, it might not be harmful to their families, beyond harm that's already happened. Marriages are complicated. For example, some marriages are essentially financial arrangements, maintained by both parties despite romantic betrayal. Some marriages start as romatic arrangements, but morph into marriages of convenience, or are maintained "for the sake of the kids". And sticking with a broken marriage "for the sake of the kids" isn't always the wrong thing to do. It depends.
- bennyelv 4y agoI would then argue that that's not cheating. Cheating involves deception, the deception is telling your partner that they're your exclusive romantic interest when they're not. If everybody knows and everyone is fine with it, then there is no problem.
- civilized 4y agoI'm not sure GP is arguing for a negotiated open relationship, since this whole comment tree is about affairs. I figured the idea was more "having an affair can be OK if you really need it because your marriage sucks, divorce and a negotiated open relationship are not viable options, and provided no one finds out"