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I see a few folks in these comments essentially saying "If only everyone else would do this!" This rather misses the point. You don't empathize with your oppo

I see a few folks in these comments essentially saying "If only everyone else would do this!" This rather misses the point. You don't empathize with your opposition for their sake; you do it for your own sake. You do it because you might learn something. You do it because it helps to build relationships, like (say) the famous friendship between the late justices Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Antonin Scalia. You even do it because your argument will be more effective. But the bottom line is that you do it because it's better for your own mental health if you try to think of the people around you as good.

pjscott 4y ago
You're right that this has unilateral benefits, but it's even better if something like this becomes encoded in social norms. For example, there are online communities where it's simply expected that you'll assume good faith and basic decency from the people you're arguing with. To do otherwise would be a serious faux pas. There are also online communities where everything immediately devolves into flamewars in which everyone is shouting and no-one is listening, and that is considered normal and inevitable. And then of course there's a whole spectrum in-between. I can tell you from experience: the places with nicer discourse norms are more pleasant and the discussions tend to be much more interesting and productive. (Compare HN with, say, most of Twitter.)