replying here because of depth, but your latest response is a much more charitable and productive way of stating things, and one I fully agree with. The proble

replying here because of depth, but your latest response is a much more charitable and productive way of stating things, and one I fully agree with. The problem here is that the default position in society is: "you should just know intuitively what to do, and if you don't, it will be detrimental to you and your career". As you point out, being ND is not being able to intuit what is typical behavior, which means being faced with a catch-22. I can make up rules by which to play the game, but then I am by definition not intuitively handling situations. I have no way of knowing when to deviate from these rules and when not. If you tell me "our goal is to build a great product", which is what I thoroughly enjoy, yet I am expected to play some nuanced game of kiss up to your manager, then it is no surprise that I am going to at some point call out the bullshit and leave. It is not wrong nor dysfunctional. As illustrated by some of the responses here, NT people are not very proficient at understanding that people might play by different rules than their own either. Because are the majority, it is expected for ND people to "concede", and not the other way around. This is where we can all make progress. Part of the more widespread recognition of neurodiversity is that it provides more tools and knowledge for neurodiverse people to work within society, but similarly, provides neurotypical people more tools and knowledge to reduce discrimination and communicate with their fellow humans. For example, as a manager, being able to gracefully point out that the discussion is not productive, and either tabling it, or learning to listen better, or respectfully pointing out what might be going on and how to better approach such topics, rather than calling people pearl-clutchers, wrong or antagonistic, and ultimately firing them or demoting them. No-one benefits here, except maybe the manager's sense of being right. While some aspects of being ND are handicapping by themselves (say, sensory sensitivities), operating under different assumptions and models is only so when they lead to discrimination and backlash, instead of acceptance and accomodation. As a ND, I accomodate and mask pretty much 24/7 already.