4 ms·

If you try to control your kids internet/device usage too much they will learn to work around it (at least once they hit the young teens). Try to have open conv

If you try to control your kids internet/device usage too much they will learn to work around it (at least once they hit the young teens). Try to have open conversations with them and teach them about the dangers of strangers, predatory microtransactions, the permanence of whatever they post on the internet etc. If you just try to monitor and restrict what they do they will grow to resent you, and they'll hide everything from you (and they'll likely be much better at this than you expect). Do note this advice is for teenagers though. I suspect you'd be quite successful limiting a 5-10 year olds unsupervised access to the internet, and probably justified in doing so imo.

PebblesRox 4y ago
I highly recommend Kidpower [0] as a resource for how to have these kinds of conversations - they're really good at making things really specific and understandable for kids without going into details that are not age-appropriate. They also have good advice for how to teach and equip kids to be independent while maintaining appropriate safety boundaries at each stage along the way to full independence. [1] Discussion and trust are important but I think there is a phase where kids do not yet have the maturity for discussion and trust to be enough to keep them safe. In the meantime, they also need supervision and physical boundaries to be safe. As an analogy, no amount of verbal instruction will allow a toddler to walk safely by themselves near traffic. Until they reach a certain maturity level, children need an adult who is paying attention and is ready to physically intervene if they start heading for the street. I think there's a similar dynamic at play when it comes to internet safety. We need to teach our kids so that they will be ready for independence but we also need to recognize that they will not be ready for full independence for quite a while, given the complexity of the risks involved. [0] https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/online-safety-for-young-people/ https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/online-safety-for-y... [1] https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/preparing-independence/ https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/preparing-independe...
PragmaticPulp 4y ago
> they will learn to work around it (at least once they hit the young teens). Teenage years and the 7-12 range are worlds apart in terms of what’s appropriate. Regardless, it’s not a good idea to let “perfect be the enemy of good”. The idea that putting any restrictions in place will result in kids going off and accessing the worst stuff doesn’t really follow, in my experience. Half the battle is communicating expectations and creating a framework for understanding what’s reasonable and what’s not.
hndamien 4y ago
I explained memetics to my kids from around 3 and have given free access (and supervision) with education like you have said and its working fine so far up to 7. He even used to turn over the ipad if there was an ad appearing (we pay for no ads mostly). It really can work down young.

PebblesRox 4y ago

I highly recommend Kidpower [0] as a resource for how to have these kinds of conversations - they're really good at making things really specific and understandable for kids without going into details that are not age-appropriate. They also have good advice for how to teach and equip kids to be independent while maintaining appropriate safety boundaries at each stage along the way to full independence. [1] Discussion and trust are important but I think there is a phase where kids do not yet have the maturity for discussion and trust to be enough to keep them safe. In the meantime, they also need supervision and physical boundaries to be safe. As an analogy, no amount of verbal instruction will allow a toddler to walk safely by themselves near traffic. Until they reach a certain maturity level, children need an adult who is paying attention and is ready to physically intervene if they start heading for the street. I think there's a similar dynamic at play when it comes to internet safety. We need to teach our kids so that they will be ready for independence but we also need to recognize that they will not be ready for full independence for quite a while, given the complexity of the risks involved. [0] https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/online-safety-for-young-people/ https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/online-safety-for-y... [1] https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/preparing-independence/ https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/preparing-independe...

PragmaticPulp 4y ago

> they will learn to work around it (at least once they hit the young teens). Teenage years and the 7-12 range are worlds apart in terms of what’s appropriate. Regardless, it’s not a good idea to let “perfect be the enemy of good”. The idea that putting any restrictions in place will result in kids going off and accessing the worst stuff doesn’t really follow, in my experience. Half the battle is communicating expectations and creating a framework for understanding what’s reasonable and what’s not.

hndamien 4y ago

I explained memetics to my kids from around 3 and have given free access (and supervision) with education like you have said and its working fine so far up to 7. He even used to turn over the ipad if there was an ad appearing (we pay for no ads mostly). It really can work down young.