4 ms·

> In terms of attractiveness, the bottom 80% of men are competing for the bottom 22% of women and the top 78% of women are competing for the top 20% of men. Th

> In terms of attractiveness, the bottom 80% of men are competing for the bottom 22% of women and the top 78% of women are competing for the top 20% of men. This feels like an incel talking point. It reductive that "tinder Elo" == "attractiveness". Especially considering that tinder controls algorithm and will just do whatever makes the most money. Hard pressed to say this is the "nartual" behavior of young people these days.

MrMember 4y ago
That doesn't mean it isn't true. OkCupid used to publish all sorts of interesting data before they were bought by Match, including similar statistics to those.
faeriechangling 4y ago
I find it interesting how whenever I see people looking into data from dating sites drawing any conclusions from the data is written off as “incel talking points”. It’s pretty easy to do an experiment on dating sites where you control for other variables by testing for matches with photos and different descriptions and you’re going to find attractiveness is a large part of the effect because the point of these apps is casual sex. I am interested with the derision people react with by even pointing out that the world of casual sex is not egalitarian particularly for men. I find it interesting that is a stigmatized fact.
richbell 4y ago
> This feels like an incel talking point. I mean, it is... because it's a fairly consistent finding across all dating apps. It's not uncommon for women to get hundreds of matches, whereas it's extremely common for 'average' men to get nothing but bots. Whether this is indicative of people's "natural" behaviour is somewhat irrelevant because perception is reality, and the reality for many young men is that they don't feel attractive or desired by anyone. Swiping right hundreds of times and not receiving a single match is incredibly dejecting; of course, many don't realize that they're being manipulated and that "Tinder matches" != objective desirability. > Especially considering that tinder controls algorithm and will just do whatever makes the most money. Spot on. I think it's also worth mentioning that the Match Group, which owns Tinder, has been aggressively purchasing dating apps and monetizing them in ways that intentionally sabotaged people's ability to find a partner. I believe the success of Tinder has also lead to them copying the same shallow and problematic mechanics (quickly swiping yes/no based on a picture) into other apps which previously tried to find meaningful matches for people. Online dating has rapidly replaced traditional methods of meeting romantic partners. For many people, this (intentionally) dysfunctional system is all they've ever known, and is considered normal.
yucky 4y ago
>This feels like an incel talking point. I think you're probably right that it's a common talking point, but it is factual based on the data. Maybe that's why they consistently reference it?

MrMember 4y ago

That doesn't mean it isn't true. OkCupid used to publish all sorts of interesting data before they were bought by Match, including similar statistics to those.

faeriechangling 4y ago

I find it interesting how whenever I see people looking into data from dating sites drawing any conclusions from the data is written off as “incel talking points”. It’s pretty easy to do an experiment on dating sites where you control for other variables by testing for matches with photos and different descriptions and you’re going to find attractiveness is a large part of the effect because the point of these apps is casual sex. I am interested with the derision people react with by even pointing out that the world of casual sex is not egalitarian particularly for men. I find it interesting that is a stigmatized fact.

richbell 4y ago

> This feels like an incel talking point. I mean, it is... because it's a fairly consistent finding across all dating apps. It's not uncommon for women to get hundreds of matches, whereas it's extremely common for 'average' men to get nothing but bots. Whether this is indicative of people's "natural" behaviour is somewhat irrelevant because perception is reality, and the reality for many young men is that they don't feel attractive or desired by anyone. Swiping right hundreds of times and not receiving a single match is incredibly dejecting; of course, many don't realize that they're being manipulated and that "Tinder matches" != objective desirability. > Especially considering that tinder controls algorithm and will just do whatever makes the most money. Spot on. I think it's also worth mentioning that the Match Group, which owns Tinder, has been aggressively purchasing dating apps and monetizing them in ways that intentionally sabotaged people's ability to find a partner. I believe the success of Tinder has also lead to them copying the same shallow and problematic mechanics (quickly swiping yes/no based on a picture) into other apps which previously tried to find meaningful matches for people. Online dating has rapidly replaced traditional methods of meeting romantic partners. For many people, this (intentionally) dysfunctional system is all they've ever known, and is considered normal.

yucky 4y ago

>This feels like an incel talking point. I think you're probably right that it's a common talking point, but it is factual based on the data. Maybe that's why they consistently reference it?