Are you missing a 'not' or are you indeed "totally against [all] suicide"? The 'but' immediately after makes it seem likely. I'm glad it helped you turn around

Are you missing a 'not' or are you indeed "totally against [all] suicide"? The 'but' immediately after makes it seem likely. I'm glad it helped you turn around how you felt and come back from the metaphorical ledge. But can you be sure that there are more people for whom religions helped persuade them to find solutions rather than commit suicide, than people who never found release from their suffering and ensured many years more of it than they would otherwise had they not felt guilt forcing them to stay alive? I've never believed in any religion so hard for me to put myself in that mindset, but I suppose it wouldn't make much of a difference to my understanding if I did since my point is that individual anecdotes can go either way. I do at least hope that more people are helped than hurt by religious pressure to stay alive (and indeed by religion generally).