5 ms·

I live in a Manhattan-sized 1br with my wife at the moment and one of her friends gave us _four_ martini glasses. They’re a major pain to store anywhere and wha

I live in a Manhattan-sized 1br with my wife at the moment and one of her friends gave us _four_ martini glasses. They’re a major pain to store anywhere and what’s worse we don’t drink! I had a conversation with my wife about them that literally started with her saying “Yes, but it’s the thought that counts” and I had to cause marital strife by pointing out the severe lack of thought involved in giving us something we have to store in our tiny place and will never use.

hammyhavoc 4y ago
The purpose of a gift is to be given/received. It is given to convey a sentiment. What you do after receiving it is entirely up to you. Don't fall into this trap of feeling obligating to keep an object you didn't ask for, nor expect. Love people, not things. I say this having had an impractically full home for 29 years, and now only just really figuring all this out. Finally have space to use what we do have.
- rendall 4y ago
  Applying those principles, I once immediately tossed a gift of a large, ugly toy dog, unpleasant even to touch, much less look at. The friend who gave it to me kept asking about it.
  - hammyhavoc 4y ago
    It can happen, that's for sure. But Martini glasses, probably not. I'm sure there's a strong chance they were either a gift to them, or cheap. It says a lot that the poster doesn't even drink! I've been in the same position with receiving sets of shot glasses or cocktail glasses, but anybody that knows me more than a few hours knows I don't and can't drink alcohol. In Japan, re-gifting is the norm. It is becoming more common in the UK too now that people are living in smaller properties. I find non-consumable gifts to be a stress to receive, and to give at times. I try to always make sure if I give a gift that it's consumable so that it won't linger, mainly out of respect, just like I wouldn't outstay my welcome as a guest anywhere. The worst is being gifted something handmade by would-be artists who can't see the flaws in their own work and thus why it doesn't sell, and they end up giving it out as gifts. No joke, had a room full of objectively bad paintings, poorly painted glassware, badly knitted blankets et al. A huge relief to get the space back.
- jackvalentine 4y ago
mgaunard 4y ago
You should throw away all items you haven't used for a year.
- Chris2048 4y ago
  There are lots of things that you might not use for years. Jump starter, plumbing tools, special-occasion alcohol etc.
- jackvalentine 4y ago
  A few years ago I had to clean all my crap out of my parents house. I put them in boxes unlabelled and waited a year - I couldn’t even remember what was in them so went straight to the dump and heaved them in. Absolutely great bit of advice.
  - npteljes 4y ago
    Second hand markets are also great for these. I recently sold all of my electronics online. I offered them for cheap so that I can get rid of them faster, and even the most worthless piece of junk, an 12+ yrs old, beaten up cheapo laptop with a 32 bit CPU found its new owner for some pocket change. Not all junk can be sold though, of course. But I think it's worth considering, maybe someone else will find them useful and then they can live on a bit longer.
    - ghaff 4y ago
      Selling stuff is an absolute PITA. There used to be people who would sell for you on eBay for a cut. AFAIK, that's all gone. I could never be bothered to sell the huge amount of mostly fairly low dollar stuff I don't want. Friends I know who have moved say even yard sales aren't worth the bother. I have stuff like a big pile of laserdiscs that someone would probably like but just not worth the effort to sell.
      - npteljes 4y ago
        I agree, it's a lot of extra effort. Can you elaborate a bit on how even the yard sales weren't worth the bother? I imagine that I'd basically sell everything for the first person who wants it, for whatever price.
quickthrower2 4y ago
Regift (or maybe regrift… in this case)

hammyhavoc 4y ago

The purpose of a gift is to be given/received. It is given to convey a sentiment. What you do after receiving it is entirely up to you. Don't fall into this trap of feeling obligating to keep an object you didn't ask for, nor expect. Love people, not things. I say this having had an impractically full home for 29 years, and now only just really figuring all this out. Finally have space to use what we do have.

rendall 4y ago
Applying those principles, I once immediately tossed a gift of a large, ugly toy dog, unpleasant even to touch, much less look at. The friend who gave it to me kept asking about it.
- hammyhavoc 4y ago
  It can happen, that's for sure. But Martini glasses, probably not. I'm sure there's a strong chance they were either a gift to them, or cheap. It says a lot that the poster doesn't even drink! I've been in the same position with receiving sets of shot glasses or cocktail glasses, but anybody that knows me more than a few hours knows I don't and can't drink alcohol. In Japan, re-gifting is the norm. It is becoming more common in the UK too now that people are living in smaller properties. I find non-consumable gifts to be a stress to receive, and to give at times. I try to always make sure if I give a gift that it's consumable so that it won't linger, mainly out of respect, just like I wouldn't outstay my welcome as a guest anywhere. The worst is being gifted something handmade by would-be artists who can't see the flaws in their own work and thus why it doesn't sell, and they end up giving it out as gifts. No joke, had a room full of objectively bad paintings, poorly painted glassware, badly knitted blankets et al. A huge relief to get the space back.
jackvalentine 4y ago

mgaunard 4y ago

You should throw away all items you haven't used for a year.

Chris2048 4y ago
There are lots of things that you might not use for years. Jump starter, plumbing tools, special-occasion alcohol etc.
jackvalentine 4y ago
A few years ago I had to clean all my crap out of my parents house. I put them in boxes unlabelled and waited a year - I couldn’t even remember what was in them so went straight to the dump and heaved them in. Absolutely great bit of advice.
- npteljes 4y ago
  Second hand markets are also great for these. I recently sold all of my electronics online. I offered them for cheap so that I can get rid of them faster, and even the most worthless piece of junk, an 12+ yrs old, beaten up cheapo laptop with a 32 bit CPU found its new owner for some pocket change. Not all junk can be sold though, of course. But I think it's worth considering, maybe someone else will find them useful and then they can live on a bit longer.
  - ghaff 4y ago
    Selling stuff is an absolute PITA. There used to be people who would sell for you on eBay for a cut. AFAIK, that's all gone. I could never be bothered to sell the huge amount of mostly fairly low dollar stuff I don't want. Friends I know who have moved say even yard sales aren't worth the bother. I have stuff like a big pile of laserdiscs that someone would probably like but just not worth the effort to sell.
    - npteljes 4y ago
      I agree, it's a lot of extra effort. Can you elaborate a bit on how even the yard sales weren't worth the bother? I imagine that I'd basically sell everything for the first person who wants it, for whatever price.

quickthrower2 4y ago

Regift (or maybe regrift… in this case)