A fellow non-physicist, non-scientist here. If I understand correctly the problem is that if you attempt to change the state of one particle, two particles are

A fellow non-physicist, non-scientist here. If I understand correctly the problem is that if you attempt to change the state of one particle, two particles are no longer entangled. In other words you can observe one particle and be sure that the other particle has the same properties but the moment you decide to change one particle's state you can't say anything about the other particle.