I can't find the source anymore, but I once heard a pretty interesting theory: Men use banter as a form of indirect emotional connection. Playing rough with you

I can't find the source anymore, but I once heard a pretty interesting theory: Men use banter as a form of indirect emotional connection. Playing rough with your male friends is like 'bouncing balls off their emotional walls'. As long as your friend reacts in a relaxed way, you know everything is alright. But if he seems uncomfortable, you know something is up and can offer support directly (by asking) or indirectly (by just being there and providing an outlet untouched by whatever's bothering him). That's definitely still a point in favor of the article's main thesis (that men have a strange relationship to openly displaying emotions and emotional connections), but this way of viewing men's banter evidently was interesting enough that it has stuck with me for a few years now.