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I don’t usually post, but I wanted to weigh in. We don’t usually know quickly if it’s going to work out with someone. If you can get that many dates, then you a

I don’t usually post, but I wanted to weigh in. We don’t usually know quickly if it’s going to work out with someone. If you can get that many dates, then you are attractive so don’t worry about that. And guys are attracted to you so don’t worry about that. Coffee is a perfect first date, and waiting until you are comfortable with a guy before intimacy is also fine - just don’t let the guy feel like you are using them. The right guy will not care if you make more money - you can weed them out that way. But for the others, try just taking it one step at a time. Be patient with them and yourself. The first few dates should only be about if you can laugh, have fun, and share honestly with each other. They should never insult you or put you down or purposefully make you ashamed of yourself or your life choices. They will certainly say the wrong things sometimes and mess up, its ok- just no pattern of it. We all make mistakes amd it can be hard to forgive. But serious long term relationships have to have forgiveness or they would end at the first mistake. Tell them you always wanted a family but previously work got in the way. Take the time to make a real connection and follow your heart. Date one person maybe 5 or 6 times, and if you don’t feel potential by then, pick another. Your success and ambition is attractive. You will succeed if you have patience with them. Good communication and being able to laugh together is essential. Pick those guys who you can talk and laugh with and go on one date every week or two with them. I know you will succeed and once you find that right guy it will all become so easy and move quickly after a short amount of time!

actfrench 4y ago
I like this advice a lot and how you write. It’s very kind. Thanks so much for the encouragement and taking the time to weigh in even though you don’t usually post. I appreciate it.
ifelsethenyeah 4y ago
Coffee maybe fine for some people, but it's too sterile, formulaic, low-effort, and low-energy like a business meeting. I prefer to do something. And don't waste 5-6 dates when you know in the first 1-2 if they're worth exploring more. There's too many people and you develop a sense about personality traits. For example, I avoided a date with someone who presented themselves as a comedienne. She came off as arrogant and unwilling to listen to anyone else initially but I gave her a second try. Her set was so bad, I got up and left after she finished because I'm not going to say it was fantastic. I had a beer somewhere else. Lo and behold, who walks in but this same chick. I hoped she didn't see me but she came over and started bitching me the riot act. I told her that my suspicions were proven correct by her behavior and that she should get lost unless she wanted a face full of pepper spray. I told her to fuck off and let me enjoy my beer.

actfrench 4y ago

I like this advice a lot and how you write. It’s very kind. Thanks so much for the encouragement and taking the time to weigh in even though you don’t usually post. I appreciate it.

ifelsethenyeah 4y ago

Coffee maybe fine for some people, but it's too sterile, formulaic, low-effort, and low-energy like a business meeting. I prefer to do something. And don't waste 5-6 dates when you know in the first 1-2 if they're worth exploring more. There's too many people and you develop a sense about personality traits. For example, I avoided a date with someone who presented themselves as a comedienne. She came off as arrogant and unwilling to listen to anyone else initially but I gave her a second try. Her set was so bad, I got up and left after she finished because I'm not going to say it was fantastic. I had a beer somewhere else. Lo and behold, who walks in but this same chick. I hoped she didn't see me but she came over and started bitching me the riot act. I told her that my suspicions were proven correct by her behavior and that she should get lost unless she wanted a face full of pepper spray. I told her to fuck off and let me enjoy my beer.