All of my therapists have told me I have to feel the painful feelings, not try to escape them. Doing that is another story. But they have been very much focus

All of my therapists have told me I have to feel the painful feelings, not try to escape them. Doing that is another story. But they have been very much focused on feeling emotions and not downplaying them, not being scared of unpleasant feelings. The therapist with a buddhist psychology background especially... it's like literally the opposite of where therapy has led you, they teach me that the fear of fear is worse than the fear itself, that the things we do to escape fear, or out of fear of failure, are worse than the fear itself or the failure itself, and can stunt our lives... quite what you are saying. I'm sorry you had a bad experience with therapists.