3 ms·

This is all thinking in hindsight, so maybe it's backwards rationalisation, but when I started meditating it felt like it helped me improve my focus at work, bu

This is all thinking in hindsight, so maybe it's backwards rationalisation, but when I started meditating it felt like it helped me improve my focus at work, but around the same time I've become more emotionally disregulated. So, maybe there is something to what you're saying. This is very anecdotal though (and I've definitely had an abusive mother)

Trasmatta 4y ago
I've read a lot of anecdotal reports just like yours. I think it's way more common than people think when they get into meditation. Especially for people who had any trauma growing up. I think the IFS model offers an interesting hypothesis for why this happens. According to IFS, we have parts that experienced extreme pain in childhood that hold onto that pain and become "exiles". Other parts are put in front of them as "protectors". Meditation seems to quiet the protectors, which can unleash the pain of the exiles unexpectedly, leaving us without the ability to deal with it. IFS takes a different approach by working with the protectors, not against them. You only go to the exiles (the deep pain underneath) with the permission of the protectors.