Neuropsychology offers a nigh-insultingly simple, drab explanation. Sex isn't simply a matter of stimulation. Sexual arousal is controlled by the parasympatheti

Neuropsychology offers a nigh-insultingly simple, drab explanation. Sex isn't simply a matter of stimulation. Sexual arousal is controlled by the parasympathetic nervous system, which becomes more active when the organism is relaxed. Everything is stimulating, nobody is comfortable. I could spend all day listing possible culprits. It's not hard to turn this into an opportunity to take shots at the left, or the right, for any of a thousand petty reasons. But that would miss the point: stop being mean. Stop gossiping, stop leering, stop groping, stop cajoling your partner to try that thing you read about, stop comparing people to each other, stop being a show-off, stop being "provocative", stop imputing sexual insecurity in every third argument, stop putting naked models in advertising, stop writing songs glorifying exploitation, stop cheating, stop lying, stop cat-calling, and stop making jokes about rape, literally, for fuck's sake. https://thelastpsychiatrist.com/2011/02/hes_just_not_that_into_anyone.html https://thelastpsychiatrist.com/2011/02/hes_just_not_that_in... >He's not retreating into porn because real women don't measure up, he's retreating into it because he doesn't measure up. [italics in original]