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1. Just a suggestion: How about trying some mindfulness exercises? I realized I could focus better after 15-20 minutes of meditation. I am sure something simila

1. Just a suggestion: How about trying some mindfulness exercises? I realized I could focus better after 15-20 minutes of meditation. I am sure something similar might be available given how popular meditation is nowadays. You could try the headspace app - AFAIK, there are 10 (3~8 min) free short sessions. You can build up on that. 2. Also please open up to a core group of friends. That works as good as counseling. Knowing a bunch of people whom you could share your life dramatically reduces stress. Its a support mechanism as human beings are inherently social. Take up the courage to talk to your instructors about academic difficulties. You'd be surprised how willing academic people are to go the extra mile. One thing to remember: We're always alone. Our existence is atomic in a way - an independent event & you are your best help. It is a hard fact to swallow. No matter how social we are, our lives are our own to live. We try to find meaning to our existence but no one will really understand you 100% & your trials and tribulations - not even your parents. If you are in a tough spot, only you can pull yourself out of the dumps by conscious efforts & bold decisions. Take deep breaths, build your courage up and fight your way out. Lot of people reading your story will be rooting for you!

deleted 4y ago
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antwerp1 4y ago
Fixed that last paragraph: You are never alone. You didn’t choose to come into existence-at the very least, your parents (and others who raised you) will always have a physical and emotional bond of care and concern for you. They likely know you very well and want to see you thrive. No matter how alone you feel, keep in mind that the emotions you experience, and even the general challenges you face, will 100% have been experienced by many others. If you are in a tough spot, reach out to people around you: your family, your teachers, mentors, even your neighbor. Take deep breaths, build your courage up and talk to a professional therapist. Don’t be afraid to meditate on your challenges and seek answers in collective wisdom. Share what you discover. Lots of people reading your story will find themselves in it, and your resilience can become a source of hope others.
- srvmshr 4y ago
  Thanks but no. The dismissive nature of your initial comment is irksome. As someone who has lived through a very similar phase, I would find your words encouraging but not very helpful personally. But then it is subjective. I meant every word in the philosophical sense. While sharing what you feel and experience is good, it doesn't take away the fact that each one has a slightly different experiences, takeaways and optics & their alone. My goal was not to give a obligatory advice (like the usual case), but give a reality check that we alone experience what we are going through and rise up to the occasion. Let me share: I had experience with therapy for suicidal depression twice. My parents were supportive but due to generational gaps, they couldn't empathize. I don't blame them. They are well meaning, like 90% parents. But they never could internalize what depressed me, although they knew what bothered me. The counseling made little difference. The medications made it worse. I learnt the hard way how I thought of my problem was unique to me. No one could put themselves in my shoes. My pain was mine alone. And I had to wade through it to get better. A lot of people confuse professional help to be the sum and solution to their mental issue, until it is late. Counseling was like a 'mental walking stick'. I have shuffled through a dozen therapists to know it will only help so much. Well meaning advice is great, but well meant reality-check is better. I mean to convey 'he is his best help and needs re-evaluating/rethinking how to brace with the issue in hand'. No one will solve his problems - at best cheer for him or handhold him. But he will have to walk the path. And it is okay to understand that people won't always get it 100%. You and I look at hardship differently and choose to share our empathy differently as well. Your opinion is valuable for the OP too. I respect that. But to say "Fixed it" just shows you abjectly dismissed someone's viewpoint & suffering as worthless. To each his own. If this approach helped you in life, I am glad it worked for you. It did not for me. I will stand by my last paragraph - it is meant for the OP.

deleted 4y ago

[deleted]

antwerp1 4y ago

Fixed that last paragraph: You are never alone. You didn’t choose to come into existence-at the very least, your parents (and others who raised you) will always have a physical and emotional bond of care and concern for you. They likely know you very well and want to see you thrive. No matter how alone you feel, keep in mind that the emotions you experience, and even the general challenges you face, will 100% have been experienced by many others. If you are in a tough spot, reach out to people around you: your family, your teachers, mentors, even your neighbor. Take deep breaths, build your courage up and talk to a professional therapist. Don’t be afraid to meditate on your challenges and seek answers in collective wisdom. Share what you discover. Lots of people reading your story will find themselves in it, and your resilience can become a source of hope others.

srvmshr 4y ago
Thanks but no. The dismissive nature of your initial comment is irksome. As someone who has lived through a very similar phase, I would find your words encouraging but not very helpful personally. But then it is subjective. I meant every word in the philosophical sense. While sharing what you feel and experience is good, it doesn't take away the fact that each one has a slightly different experiences, takeaways and optics & their alone. My goal was not to give a obligatory advice (like the usual case), but give a reality check that we alone experience what we are going through and rise up to the occasion. Let me share: I had experience with therapy for suicidal depression twice. My parents were supportive but due to generational gaps, they couldn't empathize. I don't blame them. They are well meaning, like 90% parents. But they never could internalize what depressed me, although they knew what bothered me. The counseling made little difference. The medications made it worse. I learnt the hard way how I thought of my problem was unique to me. No one could put themselves in my shoes. My pain was mine alone. And I had to wade through it to get better. A lot of people confuse professional help to be the sum and solution to their mental issue, until it is late. Counseling was like a 'mental walking stick'. I have shuffled through a dozen therapists to know it will only help so much. Well meaning advice is great, but well meant reality-check is better. I mean to convey 'he is his best help and needs re-evaluating/rethinking how to brace with the issue in hand'. No one will solve his problems - at best cheer for him or handhold him. But he will have to walk the path. And it is okay to understand that people won't always get it 100%. You and I look at hardship differently and choose to share our empathy differently as well. Your opinion is valuable for the OP too. I respect that. But to say "Fixed it" just shows you abjectly dismissed someone's viewpoint & suffering as worthless. To each his own. If this approach helped you in life, I am glad it worked for you. It did not for me. I will stand by my last paragraph - it is meant for the OP.