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Seek counseling. You're making life decisions based on web boards. Somehow programming and your relationship with your spouse are tied up together. You're ridi

Seek counseling. You're making life decisions based on web boards. Somehow programming and your relationship with your spouse are tied up together. You're riding really high now. You were really low before. Emotional roller coasters mean you should talk with someone, regardless of how you're feeling right now.

aidenn0 4y ago
> Seek counseling. You're making life decisions based on web boards. Somehow programming and your relationship with your spouse are tied up together. > > You're riding really high now. You were really low before. Emotional roller coasters mean you should talk with someone, regardless of how you're feeling right now. Is it that hard to believe that changing what one spends over a third of their waking hours per week on can have a significant impact on one's emotional well being?
- Phileosopher 4y ago
  I think it's a specific cultural idiosyncrasy that comes from (I'm guessing) modern USA. There's this strange "work-life balance" ethos, where the two have some sort of invisible barrier that holds them at diametric odds with one another. I'm still working out a theory, but I think it's a descendant of the Greatest Generation/Baby Boomer work values starting in the 1940s after practically every able-bodied young man became militarized. Needless to say (or maybe needfully), it's tripe, as you've indicated. Work creates meaning in its own right, yes, but not if someone despises it, and a sense of duty alone will _not_ empower someone to sleep well at night.
switchbak 4y ago
I think you're being a little harsh maybe? I agree big mood swings like this are a concern, but jobs do a lot to affect our happiness. I'm likewise a little concerned about a partner who "wants a big house", but that's a highly condensed statement about what is no doubt a more nuanced situation. I've jumped ship and had it be a really positive experience. Wouldn't be averse to it again, and I think that's mostly what this post is about: recognized that their career was important to them, dug deep and found a better job, now they're sharing excitement their about it. It's also important to not get too much personal identification from a job (see Mike Rowe's thoughts on happy people working crappy jobs), and to not overwork, but whatever - they're making progress!
rattray 4y ago
Your first paragraph does not come across as considerate. Your second sounds like good advice to me too, if a little presumptuous. How well do you know OP?
barry-cotter 4y ago
neuronic 4y ago
Please stop psychologically evaluating someone over an Internet comment.
- tsol 4y ago
  People are making a lot of strange, reaching conclusions based on little information
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]

aidenn0 4y ago

> Seek counseling. You're making life decisions based on web boards. Somehow programming and your relationship with your spouse are tied up together. > > You're riding really high now. You were really low before. Emotional roller coasters mean you should talk with someone, regardless of how you're feeling right now. Is it that hard to believe that changing what one spends over a third of their waking hours per week on can have a significant impact on one's emotional well being?

Phileosopher 4y ago
I think it's a specific cultural idiosyncrasy that comes from (I'm guessing) modern USA. There's this strange "work-life balance" ethos, where the two have some sort of invisible barrier that holds them at diametric odds with one another. I'm still working out a theory, but I think it's a descendant of the Greatest Generation/Baby Boomer work values starting in the 1940s after practically every able-bodied young man became militarized. Needless to say (or maybe needfully), it's tripe, as you've indicated. Work creates meaning in its own right, yes, but not if someone despises it, and a sense of duty alone will _not_ empower someone to sleep well at night.

switchbak 4y ago

I think you're being a little harsh maybe? I agree big mood swings like this are a concern, but jobs do a lot to affect our happiness. I'm likewise a little concerned about a partner who "wants a big house", but that's a highly condensed statement about what is no doubt a more nuanced situation. I've jumped ship and had it be a really positive experience. Wouldn't be averse to it again, and I think that's mostly what this post is about: recognized that their career was important to them, dug deep and found a better job, now they're sharing excitement their about it. It's also important to not get too much personal identification from a job (see Mike Rowe's thoughts on happy people working crappy jobs), and to not overwork, but whatever - they're making progress!

rattray 4y ago

Your first paragraph does not come across as considerate. Your second sounds like good advice to me too, if a little presumptuous. How well do you know OP?

barry-cotter 4y ago

neuronic 4y ago

Please stop psychologically evaluating someone over an Internet comment.

tsol 4y ago
People are making a lot of strange, reaching conclusions based on little information
deleted 4y ago
[deleted]