In books and lectures available on YouTube, Robert Sapolsky really goes in to nature, nurture, and the effects of both which clearly rejects "it doesn't matter

In books and lectures available on YouTube, Robert Sapolsky really goes in to nature, nurture, and the effects of both which clearly rejects "it doesn't matter how you raise your kids" but also underlines that there are also strong genetic factors that you have little opportunity to change. Your future is not written in your genetics, nor are you a blank slate, a lump of clay free to mold into anything. Genetics gives you a range of possibilities, experience gives you a path through them. There is an understandable but wrong motivation to free people from the guilt of any of their actions by saying things like "it doesn't matter". Yes, we do need to reject the extreme helicopter-parent attempt to achieve perfection, it's toxic and not all that helpful. Doing it by claiming nothing matters at all is wrong. Sapolsky has several good series of lectures on The Great Courses, an into human behavior Stanford course on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNnIGh9g6fA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNnIGh9g6fA , and a few books including Behave. (there is a lot of overlap between all of these, you'll get bored hearing the same thing if you consume multiples)