I'm neither an SWE parent, nor American or German so I can't advice on anything related to those. Instead I think you should also consider this (ultimately more

I'm neither an SWE parent, nor American or German so I can't advice on anything related to those. Instead I think you should also consider this (ultimately more important I think FWIW): What nationality do you want your children to be? If the thought of your children growing up to be Germans is unbearable to you but if the thought of your children being Americans is acceptable to your wife then you should chose CA, and vice versa. A lot of tension tend to occur in families where one or both parents come from a different culture than the one their children grow up in. If you plan to be in one country when they are young and then make a move to the other country when they are older then that is also something I would advice against, better chose one country and stick with it. At least in my experience, people that moved to a new country in (especially late) childhood will face many challenges, some of which may prove too hard. In general I think people should consider the effects for the children when making these kinds of choices. It has lifelong implications for them.