It sucks and I'm truly sorry you have to deal with it. The only reason I know about it and can truly empathize is because I have epilepsy and my first medicatio

It sucks and I'm truly sorry you have to deal with it. The only reason I know about it and can truly empathize is because I have epilepsy and my first medication caused severe clinical depression, my second made me suicidal and now my third (combinatorial, one of which is used as a bipolar medication weirdly) seems to have the fewest side effects. But saying that, it was different than just a mood and ot was, at least in my case, for sure chemical. Getting off of those medications was like flipping a switch, as I hadn't had depression or had suicidal thoughts in the past, or since. It was so bizarre and eye opening, to say the least.