3 ms·

A lot of stuff going on here. 1. You're clearly NOT incompetent. If you were, you couldn't possibly hold the web and mobile platform together entirely on your

A lot of stuff going on here. 1. You're clearly NOT incompetent. If you were, you couldn't possibly hold the web and mobile platform together entirely on your own for that long AND handle every on call incident. 2. The thing that surprised me most about burnout was the physical symptoms. You've got them. It only gets worse from here if you keep doing what you're doing. 3. It makes perfect sense to me that you don't feel like you're getting better in that environment. The rockstar developer is a myth, but the band is not. You get better by practicing with other talented people. 4. You already know this, but you're being taken advantage of. So given all that... 1. Everyone telling you to take a break is correct. Go outside and look at trees, read a book somewhere scenic, shut off your phone. If you need to take sick time to do this, so be it. It's not going to make you feel normal, but it will give your wildly overworked brain some relief. 2. Hit up recruiters, hit up whatever network you have (including old acquaintances). Your story is incredibly straightforward: you held the line on these systems by yourself for years on end, including all their on-call needs, it's enough work for a 4-person team, and no help is coming. You're looking to work on an actual team where people actually learn from each other. 3. If possible, take some time off between the old job and the new job just to take care of yourself. Good luck.

croon 4y ago
> 2. Hit up recruiters, hit up whatever network you have (including old acquaintances). Your story is incredibly straightforward: you held the line on these systems by yourself for years on end, including all their on-call needs, it's enough work for a 4-person team, and no help is coming. You're looking to work on an actual team where people actually learn from each other. OP said they weren't good at networking, but I just want to echo this. I might be better than average at networking for the field (at least traditionally), but when I started freelancing I mainly go through recruiters (who do take a cut, but worth it for me). There are plenty of recruiters for employed work too, and hopefully some will recognize both the value in your resume and your humility. Tech meetups have also started up again after covid, try to go to one of those if you're in any kind of metropolitan area. It might not be the specific topic you're interested in, but there are going to be other people who also want to network, and hey, free pizza (usually).
- hnzix 4y ago
  > I mainly go through recruiters (who do take a cut, but worth it for me). Recruiters can be great to avoid the networking dance. Make sure to look at salary surveys so you have a ballpark for pay, ask the recruiter what % cut they are taking, and always engage with at least three separate recruiters for calibration. If a recruiter pressures you into being exclusive, laugh and hang up.
balex 4y ago
> 3. It makes perfect sense to me that you don't feel like you're getting better in that environment. The rockstar developer is a myth, but the band is not. You get better by practicing with other talented people. I can't stress this enough. Being part of a team you appreciate helps a lot. First and foremost, with burnout. Knowing you have teammates you can share daily stuff with, and lean on when you need to, is a lot. Feeling like they can do the same with you, makes it an even more powerful experience. All in all, it sounds like, at this point, you should optimize for people and not tech excellence. The latter can follow when you have a supportive environment. As others suggested, take some time off to put out the fire. Then move on to find a job in a team you think you might like. btw, during the time off, things might get worse mentally before they get better. Simply because you won't be able to hide from your thoughts and feelings anymore. It could do you good to set simple, achievable daily goals that serve a small purpose and not aim for something big (like learning a new skill). Stuff like going to the beach every day, or meditating for 10 minutes (without the purpose of "learning meditation" or "doing it right"). Be kind to yourself, your life isn't a race to be won. Maybe more like a hike through the wilderness.
gniv 4y ago
> 3. If possible, take some time off between the old job and the new job just to take care of yourself. This is almost always possible. Even if the recruiter pushes back, it's usually the easiest thing to negotiate.
- coffeefirst 4y ago
  Oh yeah, usually the issue wouldn't be the offer but something like health insurance.

croon 4y ago

> 2. Hit up recruiters, hit up whatever network you have (including old acquaintances). Your story is incredibly straightforward: you held the line on these systems by yourself for years on end, including all their on-call needs, it's enough work for a 4-person team, and no help is coming. You're looking to work on an actual team where people actually learn from each other. OP said they weren't good at networking, but I just want to echo this. I might be better than average at networking for the field (at least traditionally), but when I started freelancing I mainly go through recruiters (who do take a cut, but worth it for me). There are plenty of recruiters for employed work too, and hopefully some will recognize both the value in your resume and your humility. Tech meetups have also started up again after covid, try to go to one of those if you're in any kind of metropolitan area. It might not be the specific topic you're interested in, but there are going to be other people who also want to network, and hey, free pizza (usually).

hnzix 4y ago
> I mainly go through recruiters (who do take a cut, but worth it for me). Recruiters can be great to avoid the networking dance. Make sure to look at salary surveys so you have a ballpark for pay, ask the recruiter what % cut they are taking, and always engage with at least three separate recruiters for calibration. If a recruiter pressures you into being exclusive, laugh and hang up.

balex 4y ago

> 3. It makes perfect sense to me that you don't feel like you're getting better in that environment. The rockstar developer is a myth, but the band is not. You get better by practicing with other talented people. I can't stress this enough. Being part of a team you appreciate helps a lot. First and foremost, with burnout. Knowing you have teammates you can share daily stuff with, and lean on when you need to, is a lot. Feeling like they can do the same with you, makes it an even more powerful experience. All in all, it sounds like, at this point, you should optimize for people and not tech excellence. The latter can follow when you have a supportive environment. As others suggested, take some time off to put out the fire. Then move on to find a job in a team you think you might like. btw, during the time off, things might get worse mentally before they get better. Simply because you won't be able to hide from your thoughts and feelings anymore. It could do you good to set simple, achievable daily goals that serve a small purpose and not aim for something big (like learning a new skill). Stuff like going to the beach every day, or meditating for 10 minutes (without the purpose of "learning meditation" or "doing it right"). Be kind to yourself, your life isn't a race to be won. Maybe more like a hike through the wilderness.

gniv 4y ago

> 3. If possible, take some time off between the old job and the new job just to take care of yourself. This is almost always possible. Even if the recruiter pushes back, it's usually the easiest thing to negotiate.

coffeefirst 4y ago
Oh yeah, usually the issue wouldn't be the offer but something like health insurance.