4 ms·

To make friends you need to make mistakes. Litigation culture in the workplace prevents that.

jacquesm 4y ago
I don't see this. I've yet to be afraid of being sued by a co-worker and after a couple of decades I can assure you that I've made plenty of mistakes.
- slothtrop 4y ago
  If you aren't more guarded around co-workers than your friends, maybe you should be.
  - jacquesm 4y ago
    Why on earth would a co-worker sue me?
    - slothtrop 4y ago
      Suing? They can get you terminated, or hinder your advancement. Anything that can be construed as reflecting badly on you or the company can be used against you.
- bitcurious 4y ago
  In the edge case, your failed-friend coworker would sue the corporation. This would cost corporation money. The corporation doesn’t care about you having friends, but does care about losing money. As such structures the workplace to minimize the sorts of free expression that creates “shared context” but also creates room for error - discussions of politics, religion, your health, ethnicity, age, etc. - topics that in the best case build trust and curiosity and lead to friendship. My comment isn’t a commentary on people - who are mostly loving, reasonable, and forgiving. It’s a commentary on incentives and the structures those incentives lead to.
Sirened 4y ago
is this a thinly veiled complaint about being hit with sexual harassment complaints? The simple trick to solve this problem is not to sexually harass your friends either
- nickff 4y ago
  Why did you make two logical leaps just to arrive at an accusation? From the HN Guidelines: " Please respond to the strongest plausible interpretation of what someone says, not a weaker one that's easier to criticize. Assume good faith. "
  - eyelidlessness 4y ago
    Having backed out of including a reply with my downvote—which I seldom do, but couldn’t find a productive response in me despite some effort—I’m curious what your charitable interpretation is. I went through all of mine, and none of them reflected well on the commenter.
    - bitcurious 4y ago
      Bizarre but illustrative that I have to defend myself against a nebulous “uncharitable interpretation.” Are you free (according to corporate policy) to ask your coworkers about religion, health, romance, politics, ethnicity, etc.? I’m comfortable discussing all of the above with my friends, yet each is to some extent restricted in the professional context, either by default or with seniority.
      - MrJohz 4y ago
        Not the previous commenter, but yes? I have literally never worked in a place where talking about that has been forbidden. I mean, talking about it offensively is obviously not on the table, but I've discussed literally every single one of those with colleagues before. Is this a cultural thing? I'm from the UK, and I'm working now in Germany. Perhaps things are different in the US?

I don't see this. I've yet to be afraid of being sued by a co-worker and after a couple of decades I can assure you that I've made plenty of mistakes.

slothtrop 4y ago
If you aren't more guarded around co-workers than your friends, maybe you should be.
- jacquesm 4y ago
  Why on earth would a co-worker sue me?
  - slothtrop 4y ago
    Suing? They can get you terminated, or hinder your advancement. Anything that can be construed as reflecting badly on you or the company can be used against you.
bitcurious 4y ago
In the edge case, your failed-friend coworker would sue the corporation. This would cost corporation money. The corporation doesn’t care about you having friends, but does care about losing money. As such structures the workplace to minimize the sorts of free expression that creates “shared context” but also creates room for error - discussions of politics, religion, your health, ethnicity, age, etc. - topics that in the best case build trust and curiosity and lead to friendship. My comment isn’t a commentary on people - who are mostly loving, reasonable, and forgiving. It’s a commentary on incentives and the structures those incentives lead to.

Sirened 4y ago

is this a thinly veiled complaint about being hit with sexual harassment complaints? The simple trick to solve this problem is not to sexually harass your friends either

nickff 4y ago
Why did you make two logical leaps just to arrive at an accusation? From the HN Guidelines: " Please respond to the strongest plausible interpretation of what someone says, not a weaker one that's easier to criticize. Assume good faith. "
- eyelidlessness 4y ago
  Having backed out of including a reply with my downvote—which I seldom do, but couldn’t find a productive response in me despite some effort—I’m curious what your charitable interpretation is. I went through all of mine, and none of them reflected well on the commenter.
  - bitcurious 4y ago
    Bizarre but illustrative that I have to defend myself against a nebulous “uncharitable interpretation.” Are you free (according to corporate policy) to ask your coworkers about religion, health, romance, politics, ethnicity, etc.? I’m comfortable discussing all of the above with my friends, yet each is to some extent restricted in the professional context, either by default or with seniority.
    - MrJohz 4y ago
      Not the previous commenter, but yes? I have literally never worked in a place where talking about that has been forbidden. I mean, talking about it offensively is obviously not on the table, but I've discussed literally every single one of those with colleagues before. Is this a cultural thing? I'm from the UK, and I'm working now in Germany. Perhaps things are different in the US?