For what it's worth, I moved to the United States at some point halfway to adulthood, and I felt the way you describe for about eight years. It took me about th

For what it's worth, I moved to the United States at some point halfway to adulthood, and I felt the way you describe for about eight years. It took me about three to grok the language, but where I landed was so culturally homogeneous and alien that every day I dreamed of moving back. It took me moving to a different state (and a very diverse city) to be able to find places where I felt a little closer to belonging. I'm not sure where in Japan you are, but I wonder if certain places or even neighborhoods might be a little easier to integrate into from the start than others? In any case, I think conversations about whether the relationship is right or not are a little beside the point. You have a child together! Continue doing what you feel is right (i.e., it seems – trying to make it so that your daughter has a father figure for at least a little while in her formative life). I really wish mine had done that. I wouldn't focus on whether you'll stay in Japan permanently or not – just one step at a time for now, and you can always move back in a few years. Maybe your wife will follow you back just as you followed her this time, maybe not, but at least you'll have made some cherished memories with your daughter.