This is pretty typical in most organizations. There are roughly 2-3 people on a team that carry 80% of the workload in a given period. It's not out-of-the-ordin

This is pretty typical in most organizations. There are roughly 2-3 people on a team that carry 80% of the workload in a given period. It's not out-of-the-ordinary. Even average developers can become the "workhorse" in an organization. The problem seems to be a dysfunctional organization. You should feel safe to take a vacation, to turn down the heat for a while and let others take over while you recharge your energy, etc. If you start to feel like you can't control the amount of stress you feel in this position that's a big, red flag that you're heading down the road to burn out. It's never worth it. Even if you have to take a financial hit to get out you should seriously consider cutting your losses and run. If you can talk with your org leaders and let them know what you're going through and that you want to take some serious time off. Then take some serious time off. Disconnect from work and do not respond to emails, messages, etc. Find a good therapist for you and start seeing them regularly. Etc.