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I agree with this completely. I sounded just like the OP. I struggled with it for decades. Then recently I was diagnosed and started taking medication. Some of

I agree with this completely. I sounded just like the OP. I struggled with it for decades. Then recently I was diagnosed and started taking medication. Some of the problems basically stopped instantly. I implore anyone reading this and noticing it in themselves to go to a professional and find out if you have ADHD or not. I am by no means "cured" or completely functional but at least now I have a fighting chance.

boppo1 4y ago
Medication came with unacceptable side-effects for me. Real bummer.
- cancerhacker 4y ago
  There may be different medications that can help. I was initially given Dexedrine (dextroamphetamine) and it was so good and I wrote the most beautiful code and my focus was pure and I needed more and more and I lined the pills up at night and did I mention beautiful code, on on sentences and becoming insufferable? Anyway, I switched to a different stimulant (vyvanse) which had a more measured effect and did not lead to that kind of addictive over the top behavior. Apropos of the original post - I find that during a procrastination spell, I’m still “working” in the back of my mind even though it might look like I’m doing legos at work. At some point my brain hits what I think of as an “activation level” and I suddenly “flip” my attention and focus to the job at hand. It feels like what happens when you’re kindling a fire, and you get a little bit of flame in some dry stuff, and then you “pop” that flame (attention) into the larger pile of fuel.
  - hirvi74 4y ago
    > At some point my brain hits what I think of as an “activation level” and I suddenly “flip” my attention and focus to the job at hand. It feels like what happens when you’re kindling a fire, and you get a little bit of flame in some dry stuff, and then you “pop” that flame (attention) into the larger pile of fuel. What a wonderful way to describe such a feeling. I have struggled, and still struggle, with the same issue. I have no idea of get that switch to flip on faster, but I hate wasting so much of my day just waiting.
  - deleted 4y ago
    [deleted]
- Melting_Harps 4y ago
  > Medication came with unacceptable side-effects for me. Real bummer. I was tested at very young age, as most millennials were in the US, and was told I did not have it, luckily; but looking back on the people who were raised in that era and how they handed out SSRIs like candy I'm glad I dodged that bullet because the adverse affects of those drugs sound way worse than coping with ADHD--but it also explains why mental hygiene/health issues in the US are as severe as they are. It's sad that people have ADHD, I personally can enter 'flow state' and block out all things for hours, even days or weeks if I really try; but it's to the detriment of everything else and so horrible for my mental and physical health. I lived that way for almost a decade with only small pauses in between, power napping is all I slept and a good day was 3-5 hours, with work schedules that were optimized for productivity over everything and my life seriously was in shambles: I was a boot-strapping founder with a stressful day job(s) and side hustles and worked 7 days/week with 90+ hour totals. I tried my best to maintain a very contentious relationship and failed miserably at it. I think what needs to be addressed is that extremes are all bad, and OP's situation seems like it would be manageable were it not for self-satisfying rationalization to waste his time. It's like those self-sabotaging people who get off on the rush from the failure more than succeeding, this scene in Two for The Money explains it rather well [0]. 0: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdE-BZoB9SA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdE-BZoB9SA
  - fsociety 4y ago
    The stigma of medications is more harmful in my mind, I feel this deeply when I read your experience of life. The first time I took my meds, my mind was blown. It was the first time in my long life I experienced peace and quiet. Now I am able to track my work, break large tasks into smaller ones, and quiet my brain. I’m on a dose + brand name with no side-effects etc. The issue, and this isn’t true for everyone but I believe it is true for a lot, is that some doctors start people on what they think they should be at. Instead of starting at 5mg, they will do some BS calculation of gender and weight and start someone on 60mg. Yeah that is going to fucking suck.
    - Melting_Harps 4y ago
      > The stigma of medications is more harmful in my mind, I feel this deeply when I read your experience of life. Mine was a life of extremes, put simply I stopped caring about myself during that time and I poured myself into my work as I wanted to have something to show for what I felt was more than likely going to be a short Life. I didn't think I was going to get rich doing any of that, in fact I lost money for most of it's existence and I never paid myself in order to pay everyone else and keep the lights on until we accomplished our mission statement, the only thing that saved me in the end was the skill set I developed made me marketable in fintech and I got head hunted to go work for a Megaorp. I spent my Life doing what I wanted and lived a perilous and risky life and got addicted to the adrenaline rush and still deal with bad PTSD to this day. I take your words to heart, and I'm glad it worked, but sadly a family member who had a schizophrenic break down really early in life (teens) just passed from a heart attack this week; her health really went down hill after having been put on SSRI meds after that. But she also had substance abuse problems with alcohol, that run on both sides of her family, that exacerbated an already bad situation. I'm devastated, I'm glad it worked for you, but honestly... I'm not sure it's as cut and dry as you make it out to be. Back then I was trying to cope with my situation as best as I could, without medical insurance for most of that time, but I'm also the kind of person that goes to Ukraine during this situation and goes to help feed and process Ukrainians/Russians/Belarusians at the Mexican border in order to feel anything other than pain and sorrow if I have access to resources to do so. I'm not exactly seeking a medical escape to what I deal with, so much as trying to play a part in trying to accelerate the progress of the Human Condition in it's current form as I fear extinction is a real possibility. In short, I was trying to fix my Weltschmerz with seemingly noble but self-destructive behaviours because I didn't want to give in to the often depressing and bleak realities of the World. I didn't, nor do I now, want to feel any number than I already was back then. Given your handle, I imagine you understand what that show was trying to communicate the most was about addressing mental health issues more than it was an edgy hacker show with cool realistic cut scenes. I've since worked on it after the aforementioned situations and a friend's abrupt suicide last year: it forced me to re-evaluate my value system, and gain some perspective on my limitations.
- mrelectric 4y ago
  Can you please share? What was wrong?
- fsociety 4y ago
  I will not assume what you took or what doctor prescribed it but will provide you with the advice I received from a psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD. If the medication doesn’t work or has side-effects, try a new one. Find a doctor (or more ideally a psychiatrist) who starts you on the lowest dose (if a stimulant) and slowly ramps you up. The right dose is when, after taking the medication for some time like 2-4 weeks, you don’t feel much but at the end of the day you can reflect and realize you did way more than usual. Medication is a small part of ADHD treatment. People have shown improvement with healthy coping mechanisms, strategies, exercise, healthy diet, etc. I’ve heard even an official diagnosis can relieve it a bit. Of course ADHD is a blanket term and everyone’s is different. But it is possible that you would have a better experience with meds with a better doctor. I’m on meds and all my side effects have gone away due to my body adjusting, due to me buying brand name medications, and in my switch to Adderall XR. A better doctor can help you with all of this.
- hericium 4y ago
  Bupropion (Wellbutrin, Zyban) is not a stimulant but can help with ADHD. May be worth checking in cases where stimulants aren't an option. It's however not an ADHD wonder drug and Wikipedia article[1] states that: > bupropion may be effective for ADHD but (...) this conclusion has to be interpreted with caution, because clinical trials were of low quality due to small sizes and risk of bias [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bupropion#Attention_deficit_hyperactivity_disorder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bupropion#Attention_deficit_hy...
  - garbanz0 4y ago
    Anecdotally, Wellbutrin XR 150mg did help me with some problems, but not the ones described in OP. There's a couple week period of euphoria where I didn't have those issues at all, but I've come back down to baseline.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
beebeepka 4y ago
Glad it works for you but I don't think taking "party drugs" on a daily basis is a good long-term idea
- coolspot 4y ago
  1) therapeutic dosage is much less than recreational dosage 2) Drugs work differently on ADHD brains than on “normal” brains.
  - beebeepka 4y ago
    No amount of dogpiling will convince me taking amphetamines on a daily basis is good for you, ADHD or not. The mind is not the only thing being affected here. This shit is horrible for the body. Aren't there herbs that can help? Do doctors even care?
    - weakfish 4y ago
      Well, good thing you don’t need to be convinced for other people to get help. Sheesh. My partners life was literally changed by taking medication. Do you think that’s a bad thing? I strongly doubt that ‘herbs’ are more effective than decades of scientific research. I presume that you’re hearing amphetamines and thinking of the extremes; as the parent said, the medical doses are far lower than that of recreational users. Drinking coffee is a stimulant, and yet in moderation it’s not harmful to the used. Do you feel similarly about any sort of caffenation?
      - beebeepka 4y ago
        Good thing I am not trying to stop anyone, nor arguing against there being some benefits to seeking treatment. I've noticed this is mainly a US thing. If you all think it's great, there must be something to it. Like a big marketing campaign going back years. Nope, too wild! It's more probable I need a lecture on the benefits of being hooked on amphetamines in the name of mental health. How long do you think such treatment can last? Have you checked? Do it for your partner. Do you honestly think using this stuff for decades does not come with major drawbacks?

boppo1 4y ago

Medication came with unacceptable side-effects for me. Real bummer.

cancerhacker 4y ago
There may be different medications that can help. I was initially given Dexedrine (dextroamphetamine) and it was so good and I wrote the most beautiful code and my focus was pure and I needed more and more and I lined the pills up at night and did I mention beautiful code, on on sentences and becoming insufferable? Anyway, I switched to a different stimulant (vyvanse) which had a more measured effect and did not lead to that kind of addictive over the top behavior. Apropos of the original post - I find that during a procrastination spell, I’m still “working” in the back of my mind even though it might look like I’m doing legos at work. At some point my brain hits what I think of as an “activation level” and I suddenly “flip” my attention and focus to the job at hand. It feels like what happens when you’re kindling a fire, and you get a little bit of flame in some dry stuff, and then you “pop” that flame (attention) into the larger pile of fuel.
- hirvi74 4y ago
  > At some point my brain hits what I think of as an “activation level” and I suddenly “flip” my attention and focus to the job at hand. It feels like what happens when you’re kindling a fire, and you get a little bit of flame in some dry stuff, and then you “pop” that flame (attention) into the larger pile of fuel. What a wonderful way to describe such a feeling. I have struggled, and still struggle, with the same issue. I have no idea of get that switch to flip on faster, but I hate wasting so much of my day just waiting.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
Melting_Harps 4y ago
> Medication came with unacceptable side-effects for me. Real bummer. I was tested at very young age, as most millennials were in the US, and was told I did not have it, luckily; but looking back on the people who were raised in that era and how they handed out SSRIs like candy I'm glad I dodged that bullet because the adverse affects of those drugs sound way worse than coping with ADHD--but it also explains why mental hygiene/health issues in the US are as severe as they are. It's sad that people have ADHD, I personally can enter 'flow state' and block out all things for hours, even days or weeks if I really try; but it's to the detriment of everything else and so horrible for my mental and physical health. I lived that way for almost a decade with only small pauses in between, power napping is all I slept and a good day was 3-5 hours, with work schedules that were optimized for productivity over everything and my life seriously was in shambles: I was a boot-strapping founder with a stressful day job(s) and side hustles and worked 7 days/week with 90+ hour totals. I tried my best to maintain a very contentious relationship and failed miserably at it. I think what needs to be addressed is that extremes are all bad, and OP's situation seems like it would be manageable were it not for self-satisfying rationalization to waste his time. It's like those self-sabotaging people who get off on the rush from the failure more than succeeding, this scene in Two for The Money explains it rather well [0]. 0: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdE-BZoB9SA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdE-BZoB9SA
- fsociety 4y ago
  The stigma of medications is more harmful in my mind, I feel this deeply when I read your experience of life. The first time I took my meds, my mind was blown. It was the first time in my long life I experienced peace and quiet. Now I am able to track my work, break large tasks into smaller ones, and quiet my brain. I’m on a dose + brand name with no side-effects etc. The issue, and this isn’t true for everyone but I believe it is true for a lot, is that some doctors start people on what they think they should be at. Instead of starting at 5mg, they will do some BS calculation of gender and weight and start someone on 60mg. Yeah that is going to fucking suck.
  - Melting_Harps 4y ago
    > The stigma of medications is more harmful in my mind, I feel this deeply when I read your experience of life. Mine was a life of extremes, put simply I stopped caring about myself during that time and I poured myself into my work as I wanted to have something to show for what I felt was more than likely going to be a short Life. I didn't think I was going to get rich doing any of that, in fact I lost money for most of it's existence and I never paid myself in order to pay everyone else and keep the lights on until we accomplished our mission statement, the only thing that saved me in the end was the skill set I developed made me marketable in fintech and I got head hunted to go work for a Megaorp. I spent my Life doing what I wanted and lived a perilous and risky life and got addicted to the adrenaline rush and still deal with bad PTSD to this day. I take your words to heart, and I'm glad it worked, but sadly a family member who had a schizophrenic break down really early in life (teens) just passed from a heart attack this week; her health really went down hill after having been put on SSRI meds after that. But she also had substance abuse problems with alcohol, that run on both sides of her family, that exacerbated an already bad situation. I'm devastated, I'm glad it worked for you, but honestly... I'm not sure it's as cut and dry as you make it out to be. Back then I was trying to cope with my situation as best as I could, without medical insurance for most of that time, but I'm also the kind of person that goes to Ukraine during this situation and goes to help feed and process Ukrainians/Russians/Belarusians at the Mexican border in order to feel anything other than pain and sorrow if I have access to resources to do so. I'm not exactly seeking a medical escape to what I deal with, so much as trying to play a part in trying to accelerate the progress of the Human Condition in it's current form as I fear extinction is a real possibility. In short, I was trying to fix my Weltschmerz with seemingly noble but self-destructive behaviours because I didn't want to give in to the often depressing and bleak realities of the World. I didn't, nor do I now, want to feel any number than I already was back then. Given your handle, I imagine you understand what that show was trying to communicate the most was about addressing mental health issues more than it was an edgy hacker show with cool realistic cut scenes. I've since worked on it after the aforementioned situations and a friend's abrupt suicide last year: it forced me to re-evaluate my value system, and gain some perspective on my limitations.
mrelectric 4y ago
Can you please share? What was wrong?
fsociety 4y ago
I will not assume what you took or what doctor prescribed it but will provide you with the advice I received from a psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD. If the medication doesn’t work or has side-effects, try a new one. Find a doctor (or more ideally a psychiatrist) who starts you on the lowest dose (if a stimulant) and slowly ramps you up. The right dose is when, after taking the medication for some time like 2-4 weeks, you don’t feel much but at the end of the day you can reflect and realize you did way more than usual. Medication is a small part of ADHD treatment. People have shown improvement with healthy coping mechanisms, strategies, exercise, healthy diet, etc. I’ve heard even an official diagnosis can relieve it a bit. Of course ADHD is a blanket term and everyone’s is different. But it is possible that you would have a better experience with meds with a better doctor. I’m on meds and all my side effects have gone away due to my body adjusting, due to me buying brand name medications, and in my switch to Adderall XR. A better doctor can help you with all of this.
hericium 4y ago
Bupropion (Wellbutrin, Zyban) is not a stimulant but can help with ADHD. May be worth checking in cases where stimulants aren't an option. It's however not an ADHD wonder drug and Wikipedia article[1] states that: > bupropion may be effective for ADHD but (...) this conclusion has to be interpreted with caution, because clinical trials were of low quality due to small sizes and risk of bias [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bupropion#Attention_deficit_hyperactivity_disorder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bupropion#Attention_deficit_hy...
- garbanz0 4y ago
  Anecdotally, Wellbutrin XR 150mg did help me with some problems, but not the ones described in OP. There's a couple week period of euphoria where I didn't have those issues at all, but I've come back down to baseline.
deleted 4y ago
[deleted]

beebeepka 4y ago

Glad it works for you but I don't think taking "party drugs" on a daily basis is a good long-term idea

coolspot 4y ago
1) therapeutic dosage is much less than recreational dosage 2) Drugs work differently on ADHD brains than on “normal” brains.
- beebeepka 4y ago
  No amount of dogpiling will convince me taking amphetamines on a daily basis is good for you, ADHD or not. The mind is not the only thing being affected here. This shit is horrible for the body. Aren't there herbs that can help? Do doctors even care?
  - weakfish 4y ago
    Well, good thing you don’t need to be convinced for other people to get help. Sheesh. My partners life was literally changed by taking medication. Do you think that’s a bad thing? I strongly doubt that ‘herbs’ are more effective than decades of scientific research. I presume that you’re hearing amphetamines and thinking of the extremes; as the parent said, the medical doses are far lower than that of recreational users. Drinking coffee is a stimulant, and yet in moderation it’s not harmful to the used. Do you feel similarly about any sort of caffenation?
    - beebeepka 4y ago
      Good thing I am not trying to stop anyone, nor arguing against there being some benefits to seeking treatment. I've noticed this is mainly a US thing. If you all think it's great, there must be something to it. Like a big marketing campaign going back years. Nope, too wild! It's more probable I need a lecture on the benefits of being hooked on amphetamines in the name of mental health. How long do you think such treatment can last? Have you checked? Do it for your partner. Do you honestly think using this stuff for decades does not come with major drawbacks?