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> I’m not rude One word Danes (and other N.Es) often get in trouble for is 'fuck'. In Denmark it is no problem to use this in many business meetings but will

> I’m not rude One word Danes (and other N.Es) often get in trouble for is 'fuck'. In Denmark it is no problem to use this in many business meetings but will often spell trouble when we participate in a meeting with people from USA. We simply do not see using it as something to avoid. (and pupils in Denmark will absolutely not be sent to headmaster or parents contacted if they use it. At most it will be a glance from the teacher if they use it too much).

mavelikara 4y ago
> One word Danes (and other N.Es) often get in trouble for is 'fuck'. In Denmark it is no problem to use this in many business meetings but will often spell trouble when we participate in a meeting with people from USA. We simply do not see using it as something to avoid. Reminds me of a slide[1] DHH did at a Rails conference presentation. [1]: https://www.ruby-forum.com/t/dhh-says-f-you/57797 https://www.ruby-forum.com/t/dhh-says-f-you/57797
Trasmatta 4y ago
I would say this is generally true, except in SV start up culture. "Fuck" is used so ubiquitously there that it's almost seen as weird if you don't use it frequently.
- nautilius 4y ago
  Obviously not generally true, as silvestrov discusses in the very post you reply to.
bloak 4y ago
It's unclear whether you're talking about the English word "fuck" or some Danish "equivalent". Either way, the word doesn't necessarily mean the same thing to people who speak different languages, or even just different dialects, do it's unclear to what extent the difference you're referring to is cultural or linguistic. (Is there even a clear distinction between "cultural" and "linguistic"?)
- tinco 4y ago
  The English word, used in the way we picked up from American cultural expression like TV, movies and music. The meaning is the same but the sensitivity to it is different. To us Samuel L Jackson characters are colourful and funny, not rude or abrasive, perhaps that was lost in translation.
  - js2 4y ago
    Fuck is one of the seven dirty words: https://interviews.televisionacademy.com/news/the-seven-dirty-words-that-got-george-carlin-arrested https://interviews.televisionacademy.com/news/the-seven-dirt... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_dirty_words https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_dirty_words (Aside, but I don't think Carlin ever credited Lenny Bruce: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lenny_Bruce#Obscenity_arrests https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lenny_Bruce#Obscenity_arrests Lenny Bruce's 1962 "Dirty Words" album is on Spotify and Apple Music; worth a listen if you've never heard it.) Jackson's use of fuck is typically to add emphasis to a statement, and actually, I think he uses "motherfucker" a lot more than bare fuck[1], but in any case, fuck has different meanings depending upon context. Consider: Oh fuck. Fuck off. Fuck you. I'm fucked. Hey lady, you wanna fuck?[2] This fucking bug. Let's get the fuck outta here. It's an adaptable word but still bleeped on the air in 2022. At the same time, it's okay to allude to it on primetime TV as in: "Holy mother forking shirt balls!" [1]: https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/06/samuel-l-jackson-shaft-motherfucker-stutter https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/06/samuel-l-jackso... [2]: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Body_Heat https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Body_Heat
    - implements 4y ago
      Malcolm Tucker in “The Thick of It” made extensive use of the word “fuck”, my favourite being responding to a door knock with “Come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off.” - an impressive 33% fuck content.
      - rpmisms 4y ago
        Treatises have been written on the sheer utility of "fuck". It's an incredibly versatile word.
_whiteCaps_ 4y ago
How do you folks feel about 'collaboration'?
jimkleiber 4y ago
Ahh this brought me back! I wrote a paper in college about swearwords, taboo words, and euphemisms in first and second languages and interviewed one of my Danish friends, who shared similar sentiments about the word fuck. As an American, I feel trepidation to even type that word out here in a public forum lol. At least what I remember him saying is that he learned it from the film Raw by Eddie Murphy.
- jonnydubowsky 4y ago
  And you've brought me back to a childhood memory of my older brother, age 13 with a big smile on his face, brought me into the closet where he had a portable cassette player and a newly acquired copy of Raw, and we listened to it and had our vocabulary suddenly expanded to a new level.
  - jimkleiber 4y ago
    Lol, the level of secrecy we had back in those days, no two-way headphones, no phones, just had to scurry into corners to do the things our parents would say are bad, even though they did them just in their own scurried away corners. Thank you for sharing this story :-D
  - bradknowles 4y ago
    I was about that age when I discovered one of my Dad's records from Bill Cosby. I had never considered that "Damnit" and "Jesus Christ" could be misconstrued as the names of two children. I almost passed out laughing so hard at that album. Sometime later, I discovered his Iron Butterfly album, which also changed my world.
- SayThis_BOB 4y ago
  ..trepidation then you should go and visit a therapist. :)
  - djur 4y ago
    One thing that is more inappropriate and offensive than using the word "fuck" is suggesting that someone is mentally ill because they're not comfortable doing so.
rockostrich 4y ago
This really depends on the company, at least in tech. In the US, I've never felt awkward using the work "fuck" in meetings but I've also only worked in less uptight cultures. We also would prefer the direct phrases instead of the passive "polite" ones in the posted site.
SayThis_BOB 4y ago
LOL Even my C-Level guys are saying this (banking) Do not understan til today, why for an american this word is that problematic....
- RugnirViking 4y ago
  There is going to be a word (or several) in your native language that your grandparents would never expect to hear you say, and you would get at the very least severe talking-to from your parents if you said it in public as a young child. For those who grew up in english-speaking countries, fuck is one such word. It falls below other words, such as cunt and whore, (which I struggle to type out without asterisks or somesuch self-censoring) but it is not tolerated in children. There are plenty of less severe words in english that can be used, such as "bloody" or "damn" which roughly equate to how those who speak english as a second language use "fuck"
seadan83 4y ago
There is a rule, never swear in a foreign language, or meow at a cat, you just don't know exactly what you are saying. Saying fuck is very context dependent. It can make you seem familiar, in a formal context that would be unwelcome (ie, we are not friends so don't talk to me as if we were pals (eg: tu, vs vous in french)) It could be a sign of directness and frankness. It can be somewhat comedy, or it can be crass, or it can be ignorant and uneducated (ie, no other way to Express yourself without cursing, a limited vocabulary) It also depends on how often one curses and hears them. High schoolers curse every other sentence, but when their (teacher, parent etc) curses once and for the first time in years, it means seriousness and is powerful. So something like "you little fuck" can be all the way from endearing, to the most serious of threats
- danrochman 4y ago
  I understand the sentiment, but can’t follow the rule. I meow at cats whenever I meet them. It just always seemed the right thing to do. Granted, I don’t know exactly what I’m saying when I meow (or otherwise, really) - but then I don’t know what they’re saying, either, so I figure we’re even. In any case, none of the cats I’ve meowed at over the years have ever seemed too offended - perhaps I’ve just been lucky. Barking at dogs has been a totally different story, though…
  - yourad_io 4y ago
    When you work as a foreigner in Japan, you can be afforded a lot of leeway in business custom and etiquette - as you as you are polite. You are assumed to be a well-meaning Gaijin who doesn't know better/proper form. I've always assumed it is the same with meowing at cats: "we appreciate your effort. At least you didn't shit in our litter box like Jerry"
  - throwaway284534 4y ago
    Meow at your cat and you might just learn something. I’ve successfully learned my cat’s “language.” Thankfully it’s a small vocabulary. Unfortunately, they know that I know what they want when the subject of cat treats comes up. Funny enough, our second cat learned the local dialect after joining the family. I guess the moral here is to just gauge the room and hope for something fishy to come out of the cabinet.
cbozeman 4y ago
The more I learn about Denmark, the more I love it.
rzz3 4y ago
Fuck is generally very acceptable in meetings at my (large tech) company (in US at least), depending of course on context. I hear it a lot less from our APAC and EU offices though.

mavelikara 4y ago

> One word Danes (and other N.Es) often get in trouble for is 'fuck'. In Denmark it is no problem to use this in many business meetings but will often spell trouble when we participate in a meeting with people from USA. We simply do not see using it as something to avoid. Reminds me of a slide[1] DHH did at a Rails conference presentation. [1]: https://www.ruby-forum.com/t/dhh-says-f-you/57797 https://www.ruby-forum.com/t/dhh-says-f-you/57797

Trasmatta 4y ago

I would say this is generally true, except in SV start up culture. "Fuck" is used so ubiquitously there that it's almost seen as weird if you don't use it frequently.

nautilius 4y ago
Obviously not generally true, as silvestrov discusses in the very post you reply to.

bloak 4y ago

It's unclear whether you're talking about the English word "fuck" or some Danish "equivalent". Either way, the word doesn't necessarily mean the same thing to people who speak different languages, or even just different dialects, do it's unclear to what extent the difference you're referring to is cultural or linguistic. (Is there even a clear distinction between "cultural" and "linguistic"?)

tinco 4y ago
The English word, used in the way we picked up from American cultural expression like TV, movies and music. The meaning is the same but the sensitivity to it is different. To us Samuel L Jackson characters are colourful and funny, not rude or abrasive, perhaps that was lost in translation.
- js2 4y ago
  Fuck is one of the seven dirty words: https://interviews.televisionacademy.com/news/the-seven-dirty-words-that-got-george-carlin-arrested https://interviews.televisionacademy.com/news/the-seven-dirt... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_dirty_words https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_dirty_words (Aside, but I don't think Carlin ever credited Lenny Bruce: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lenny_Bruce#Obscenity_arrests https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lenny_Bruce#Obscenity_arrests Lenny Bruce's 1962 "Dirty Words" album is on Spotify and Apple Music; worth a listen if you've never heard it.) Jackson's use of fuck is typically to add emphasis to a statement, and actually, I think he uses "motherfucker" a lot more than bare fuck[1], but in any case, fuck has different meanings depending upon context. Consider: Oh fuck. Fuck off. Fuck you. I'm fucked. Hey lady, you wanna fuck?[2] This fucking bug. Let's get the fuck outta here. It's an adaptable word but still bleeped on the air in 2022. At the same time, it's okay to allude to it on primetime TV as in: "Holy mother forking shirt balls!" [1]: https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/06/samuel-l-jackson-shaft-motherfucker-stutter https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/06/samuel-l-jackso... [2]: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Body_Heat https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Body_Heat
  - implements 4y ago
    Malcolm Tucker in “The Thick of It” made extensive use of the word “fuck”, my favourite being responding to a door knock with “Come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off.” - an impressive 33% fuck content.
    - rpmisms 4y ago
      Treatises have been written on the sheer utility of "fuck". It's an incredibly versatile word.

_whiteCaps_ 4y ago

How do you folks feel about 'collaboration'?

jimkleiber 4y ago

Ahh this brought me back! I wrote a paper in college about swearwords, taboo words, and euphemisms in first and second languages and interviewed one of my Danish friends, who shared similar sentiments about the word fuck. As an American, I feel trepidation to even type that word out here in a public forum lol. At least what I remember him saying is that he learned it from the film Raw by Eddie Murphy.

jonnydubowsky 4y ago
And you've brought me back to a childhood memory of my older brother, age 13 with a big smile on his face, brought me into the closet where he had a portable cassette player and a newly acquired copy of Raw, and we listened to it and had our vocabulary suddenly expanded to a new level.
- jimkleiber 4y ago
  Lol, the level of secrecy we had back in those days, no two-way headphones, no phones, just had to scurry into corners to do the things our parents would say are bad, even though they did them just in their own scurried away corners. Thank you for sharing this story :-D
- bradknowles 4y ago
  I was about that age when I discovered one of my Dad's records from Bill Cosby. I had never considered that "Damnit" and "Jesus Christ" could be misconstrued as the names of two children. I almost passed out laughing so hard at that album. Sometime later, I discovered his Iron Butterfly album, which also changed my world.
SayThis_BOB 4y ago
..trepidation then you should go and visit a therapist. :)
- djur 4y ago
  One thing that is more inappropriate and offensive than using the word "fuck" is suggesting that someone is mentally ill because they're not comfortable doing so.

rockostrich 4y ago

This really depends on the company, at least in tech. In the US, I've never felt awkward using the work "fuck" in meetings but I've also only worked in less uptight cultures. We also would prefer the direct phrases instead of the passive "polite" ones in the posted site.

SayThis_BOB 4y ago

LOL Even my C-Level guys are saying this (banking) Do not understan til today, why for an american this word is that problematic....

RugnirViking 4y ago
There is going to be a word (or several) in your native language that your grandparents would never expect to hear you say, and you would get at the very least severe talking-to from your parents if you said it in public as a young child. For those who grew up in english-speaking countries, fuck is one such word. It falls below other words, such as cunt and whore, (which I struggle to type out without asterisks or somesuch self-censoring) but it is not tolerated in children. There are plenty of less severe words in english that can be used, such as "bloody" or "damn" which roughly equate to how those who speak english as a second language use "fuck"

seadan83 4y ago

There is a rule, never swear in a foreign language, or meow at a cat, you just don't know exactly what you are saying. Saying fuck is very context dependent. It can make you seem familiar, in a formal context that would be unwelcome (ie, we are not friends so don't talk to me as if we were pals (eg: tu, vs vous in french)) It could be a sign of directness and frankness. It can be somewhat comedy, or it can be crass, or it can be ignorant and uneducated (ie, no other way to Express yourself without cursing, a limited vocabulary) It also depends on how often one curses and hears them. High schoolers curse every other sentence, but when their (teacher, parent etc) curses once and for the first time in years, it means seriousness and is powerful. So something like "you little fuck" can be all the way from endearing, to the most serious of threats

danrochman 4y ago
I understand the sentiment, but can’t follow the rule. I meow at cats whenever I meet them. It just always seemed the right thing to do. Granted, I don’t know exactly what I’m saying when I meow (or otherwise, really) - but then I don’t know what they’re saying, either, so I figure we’re even. In any case, none of the cats I’ve meowed at over the years have ever seemed too offended - perhaps I’ve just been lucky. Barking at dogs has been a totally different story, though…
- yourad_io 4y ago
  When you work as a foreigner in Japan, you can be afforded a lot of leeway in business custom and etiquette - as you as you are polite. You are assumed to be a well-meaning Gaijin who doesn't know better/proper form. I've always assumed it is the same with meowing at cats: "we appreciate your effort. At least you didn't shit in our litter box like Jerry"
- throwaway284534 4y ago
  Meow at your cat and you might just learn something. I’ve successfully learned my cat’s “language.” Thankfully it’s a small vocabulary. Unfortunately, they know that I know what they want when the subject of cat treats comes up. Funny enough, our second cat learned the local dialect after joining the family. I guess the moral here is to just gauge the room and hope for something fishy to come out of the cabinet.

cbozeman 4y ago

The more I learn about Denmark, the more I love it.

rzz3 4y ago

Fuck is generally very acceptable in meetings at my (large tech) company (in US at least), depending of course on context. I hear it a lot less from our APAC and EU offices though.