5 ms·

> Not a word is wasted on actual love. > > For the cynics that may think that I'm coping, I'm not. I'm 6"4 and in a loving long term relationship. As a 5'5" As

> Not a word is wasted on actual love. > > For the cynics that may think that I'm coping, I'm not. I'm 6"4 and in a loving long term relationship. As a 5'5" Asian man (statistically one of the lowest rate of matches in online dating), I find it personally demeaning that you feel like you need to be morally outraged for me, because trust me, I sure as shit don't need it. People are attracted to attractive people. That fact has been true for all of history. Not only do attractive people get more dates, they're more likely to rise to higher positions in business and society, and earn more money. Height is only one factor in attractiveness. Are you going to be morally outraged about attractive people next? Are you going to shake your hand at the sky and ask "what about love?!?" next time you see two tall attractive people on a date? Also, citation needed on your claim that height selection is US-only. My anecdotal experience is that foreign-born women also have height preferences. Your assertion on female plastic surgery is equally ridiculous, and dare I say, downright ignorant. No, you haven't met a man who is attracted to plastic surgery, but you've definitely met men attracted to the results of plastic surgery. You've also probably met hundreds of women who have done some form of plastic surgery, you just haven't noticed because it's tastefully done. I'd dare claim the ridiculous plastic surgery is the exception, not the rule. Your idea that women do this to compete against other women in a broken society, and not because men are attracted to certain features, is laughable. Yes people are attracted to attractive people, but people can also do things to make themselves more attractive. I personally go to the gym, try to wear fashionable clothes, and groom myself. Are you going to gasp in shock and "but you shouldn't have to do that because of love!!!" Note that this is not a cynical take. I would say "the world is going to hell because some women put '6 foot only' on Tinder and get plastic surgery" is more cynical. Get off your high horse. You discredit us all.

ensan 4y ago
Calm down, no one claimed to speak for you. I come from a country where 6 ft.+ is considered pretty tall so I totally believe that this type of metric is not universal. In fact, there is no real analogue there and I have never heard of a female mentioning a specific height as a preference. It was a total culture shock to me how big of a deal your height as a number is in parts of the US culture which frankly I find vacuous and sickening. I mainly blame this on the toxic culture on the "dating" apps. (Also perhaps the imperial measurement system? lol). I guess those who knowingly participate in it have accepted the terms of use.
- fleddr 4y ago
  Not to mention the money part. Forgive me for I've been out of the dating scene for quite a while now, but this.... "a 2006 study on online dating found that a man who is 5'6'' needs an additional $175,000 to be as desirable as a man who is approximately 6' tall and only makes $62,500 a year." How exactly does this work in modern dating? See, when I was dating, I've not once had a woman ask me about my net worth or income. Never. You'll eventually find out, but not during the dating phase. A complete taboo and red flag to bring it up. One could only guess, or decipher it from somebody's job. Is it now normalized to throw around these numbers in online dating? You fill it out on a profile and people filter for it? Please tell me that's not true. Culture shock indeed. And those inches are quite expensive. A 175K extra for 4 inches. Takes a lot to build that wealth, after which you're supposed to hand it over to a woman that trades a lack of height for wealth. Quite a prize.
fleddr 4y ago
Calm down. Your reply is outrageously angry. If you had bothered to read my post with care, you'd perhaps noticed the nuance where I said height can be a soft unspoken preference, which indeed is widespread. I objected specifically against this preference becoming a rock hard criteria at some weird absolute point, say 6". That is a societal trend. It's culture, not biology. It's the hardening of a criteria that has led to the guy in the article being so desperate to do a ridiculously dangerous, painful and expensive surgery to "grow" a few inches. If you think it's normal that society sorts people into attractive or unattractive based on 4 inches, I don't know what to say to you. As for the citation you requested, I come from the land featuring the tallest men in the world: the Netherlands. My 6"4 means absolutely nothing here. There's tons of people towering an additional head above me. Even in this perfect shopping mall for women as it comes to height, I've never once heard a single woman turn it into a hard demand. There's plenty of short men here too, several of my friends are, they're all doing fine in dating. So no, it's not a thing here from my anecdotal experience. Preferences may still exist, but not in the sickening way where you completely filter out people based on such superficial and useless "quality". I don't think I said that the world is falling apart, that escalation is on you. In all your rage you're missing the forest for the trees. But do double down on your superficial attractiveness. You might get a foot in the door, after which true selection begins. Good luck, young one.
- bestbuyer__ 4y ago
  The rock hard criterion still exists in other places but it's expressed in metric. In France it is usually 180cm (~5'11"), in Japan I've heard 170cm (~5'7") so it seems that people mostly like round numbers rather than 6ft specifically.
- mxkopy 4y ago
ratww 4y ago
> You've also probably met hundreds of women who have done some form of plastic surgery, you just haven't noticed because it's tastefully done The grandparent poster clearly said "fake boobs, duck lips, botox, fake bums, fake tans, an inch of makeup", so they're clearly not talking about women who did any sort of "tasteful" (to use your word) surgery, natural tanning or regular makeup.

ensan 4y ago

Calm down, no one claimed to speak for you. I come from a country where 6 ft.+ is considered pretty tall so I totally believe that this type of metric is not universal. In fact, there is no real analogue there and I have never heard of a female mentioning a specific height as a preference. It was a total culture shock to me how big of a deal your height as a number is in parts of the US culture which frankly I find vacuous and sickening. I mainly blame this on the toxic culture on the "dating" apps. (Also perhaps the imperial measurement system? lol). I guess those who knowingly participate in it have accepted the terms of use.

fleddr 4y ago
Not to mention the money part. Forgive me for I've been out of the dating scene for quite a while now, but this.... "a 2006 study on online dating found that a man who is 5'6'' needs an additional $175,000 to be as desirable as a man who is approximately 6' tall and only makes $62,500 a year." How exactly does this work in modern dating? See, when I was dating, I've not once had a woman ask me about my net worth or income. Never. You'll eventually find out, but not during the dating phase. A complete taboo and red flag to bring it up. One could only guess, or decipher it from somebody's job. Is it now normalized to throw around these numbers in online dating? You fill it out on a profile and people filter for it? Please tell me that's not true. Culture shock indeed. And those inches are quite expensive. A 175K extra for 4 inches. Takes a lot to build that wealth, after which you're supposed to hand it over to a woman that trades a lack of height for wealth. Quite a prize.

fleddr 4y ago

Calm down. Your reply is outrageously angry. If you had bothered to read my post with care, you'd perhaps noticed the nuance where I said height can be a soft unspoken preference, which indeed is widespread. I objected specifically against this preference becoming a rock hard criteria at some weird absolute point, say 6". That is a societal trend. It's culture, not biology. It's the hardening of a criteria that has led to the guy in the article being so desperate to do a ridiculously dangerous, painful and expensive surgery to "grow" a few inches. If you think it's normal that society sorts people into attractive or unattractive based on 4 inches, I don't know what to say to you. As for the citation you requested, I come from the land featuring the tallest men in the world: the Netherlands. My 6"4 means absolutely nothing here. There's tons of people towering an additional head above me. Even in this perfect shopping mall for women as it comes to height, I've never once heard a single woman turn it into a hard demand. There's plenty of short men here too, several of my friends are, they're all doing fine in dating. So no, it's not a thing here from my anecdotal experience. Preferences may still exist, but not in the sickening way where you completely filter out people based on such superficial and useless "quality". I don't think I said that the world is falling apart, that escalation is on you. In all your rage you're missing the forest for the trees. But do double down on your superficial attractiveness. You might get a foot in the door, after which true selection begins. Good luck, young one.

bestbuyer__ 4y ago
The rock hard criterion still exists in other places but it's expressed in metric. In France it is usually 180cm (~5'11"), in Japan I've heard 170cm (~5'7") so it seems that people mostly like round numbers rather than 6ft specifically.
mxkopy 4y ago

ratww 4y ago

> You've also probably met hundreds of women who have done some form of plastic surgery, you just haven't noticed because it's tastefully done The grandparent poster clearly said "fake boobs, duck lips, botox, fake bums, fake tans, an inch of makeup", so they're clearly not talking about women who did any sort of "tasteful" (to use your word) surgery, natural tanning or regular makeup.